Life Is Beautiful

How I Met My Love

2011-10-28T14:00:00.040+05:30

This post is about a gal who walked into my life a few weeks back and changed it for ever. A gal, who from now onwards, would be the most prized possession of my life, one who would be known from 11-Dec-11 as my wife.

Her name, Shilpa Ramachandran.

Even though I had this post in my mind since a long time, I thought of waiting for the "right time". This Sunday happens to be our Engagement, and to me today turns out to be the "right time" to share our story, not just with all of you out there, but also with her, in my own words.

This one is for you, my gal...

I shall begin the story with a flash back. I would like to take you through one of the many conversations I have had with my friends who like me once had or still have the 'most eligible bachelor' title tagged onto their names. This particular conversation took place between me and Vinay a few months back while we were returning from work on a chilly evening in Melbourne.

Vinay: “What happened to that proposal that you were talking about in the afternoon?”

Me: “Nothing. Dad had called, said the horoscopes don’t match”

Vinay: “Hmm…all this is crap…horoscope matching and all…such a waste of time…even in my case horoscope is a problem...

Me: "Look at these Aussies, they don't give a damn about such things...”

Vinay: “Yeh, they would be laughing at us. I mean, it would be hard for them to digest the notion of having your parents find the “suitable match” for you and you getting married to that person."

Me: "I know. They would get constipation if they get to know the complexity of the algorithm that is used to find the “suitable match” which involves parameters like – birth date, time, horoscopes, stars, signs, religion, caste, region, family background, parents, siblings, gal n boy’s education and profession, and finally…the gal and boy!”

Vinay: "And, at the end once everything matches the guy and the gal would realize that they are not meant for eachother."

Me: "Seriously man. I at times get scared at the thought of ending up marrying someone who is not of my type."

Vinay: "Don't have too much of expectation."

Me: "I know...I don't have too much of expectation...I just want a gal who would do Bungee Jumping with me."

Vinay: "What? Bungee Jumping?"

You guys would be wondering what has Bungee Jumping got to do with marriage. Well, I had the most thrilling experience of my life few months back when I went Bungee Jumping in Queenstown, NZ. While coming back to our base camp after the jump I had this thought that I should marry someone who would do Bungee Jump with me.

It wasn’t a thought that cropped up out of nowhere. The thought was the result of the realization that my parents were desperately searching for their daughter-in-law and my days as a bachelor were numbered. My parents had been on the lookout since last year mid. Initially I had no interest in getting married for next couple of years. But over a period of time, seeing most of my batch-mates getting married and even becoming Dads & Moms, somewhere down the line I also sort of started getting concerned about finding the right match.

Dad would send across Matrimonial Profile IDs of gals and ask me to have a look. Some were good and some were pathetic. Whenever I used to come across a profile, I used to execute my own filtering algorithm – the “Bungee-Jump Filter” which just consists of this million dollar question:-

What would you do if you are asked to go Bungee Jumping with your husband? Choose from the following options:-

a) WTF dude??! It’s ma lyfe…n m gonna do ma Bungee Jump all alone…ya stay outa it..!

b) Are you nuts??!! I am not going to do such a stupid thing, neither am I going to let him do. He can jump inside the house if he is so particular about jumping.

c) Ayyo rama, I will not do Bungee Jump and all. I shall let my husband do it by himself and watch him do it.

d) Oh…I would love to go Bungee Jumping with my husband.

e) Awww…so sweet, I would love to go with him to the zoo and watch the Bungee jump…by the way, Bungee is some type of a monkey? Like Chimpanzee??

This might sound strange, but that's precisely what I was trying to decipher from all the information I could get from a gal's profile. I wanted to marry a normal gal, neither a babe nor an aunty. Ironically, in the arranged marriage market aunties and babes seemed to dominate normal gals. That's something which I realized after going through the profiles filtered with all the parameters. The most influential parameter among the list was my horoscope. I have something they call - "Shudha Jathakam" in my horoscope.

Just to give you a view, limiting ourselves to the gals available in the marriage market within my home state - Kerala, out of 1000 gals 700 would get filtered out on the basis of Region, Religion & Caste. Out of the remaining 300, 200 would get filtered out in the name of educational qualification and profession. From the 100 that remains 95 will get filtered out in the name of horoscope. Finally you will end up with 5/1000 i.e., 0.5% of the available pool of gals ready for marriage. Now, on top of this if you apply additional filters like family background, looks and all, 0.5% would come down to 0.05%.

In the end, applying my “Bungee Jump Filter” on this 0.05% would almost end up with a figure which will be equivalent to the number of hairs on Mike Tyson’s head.

Nevertheless, the search continued. Once in a blue moon a good proposal would come, but would go the way it came after the horoscopes were matched. Dad and Mom even went to see a few gals when I was still at Melbourne. Nothing clicked.

After lot of compulsion from my parents, I went for my first "Pennu Kaanal" in December last year when I had come to India on a 3 weeks’ vacation. For those who don't know, "Pennu Kaanal" is a funny affair where the guy and his family would go and see the gal and her family. The guy and his family is treated with sweets and other delicacies, and the guy gets to flirt with the gal with the blessings of elders.

Going for the first "Pennu Kaanal" was fun. I was least bothered about whether it would work out or not. All I was looking forward was to have a first-hand experience of this funny event which many Malayalam Movie Scriptwriters have made money out of.

It didn't work out. We didn't like it. Reason - The gal's Dad was shabbily dressed in a Mundu like a Mallu cab driver and tea was served to us in "kuppi glass"(you would usually see this at the local tea stalls in Kerala) instead of a decent cup and saucer.

The rejection criteria might sound absurd, but when it comes to arranged marriage you got to pull up your socks because you are gonna be scanned through microscopic eyes.

Anyways, I was glad that it didn't work out. I then left for Melbourne with peace. However, the hunt continued back home. Proposals came and went. Though I wasn't keen on getting married immediately, still seeing the proposals come and get rejected due to horoscope mismatch was kind of frustrating. Moll also had some problems in her horoscope and we kept on searching for over 3years before we got the right match for her. That was one of the main reasons why Dad & Mom were so eager to find someone soon for me.

Then, in July, after winding up my assignment at Melbourne, I returned to India. While going home from the Airport in Kochi, the main topic of discussion was the bride-hunt. Dad told that we would go the traditional way and give an ad in one of the famous dailies inviting suitable alliances. I said I was fine with it as long as the wedding was not lined up for next one year.

On 14-Aug-11, the famous daily in Kerala - Malayala Manorama took me to the doorsteps of my prospective brides. Enquiries started coming in from 6am in the morning. The number of calls we received was phenomenal. We didn't expect to get so many responses. That scared me a little bit, since somewhere back in my mind I was telling myself - "don't worry dude, it would take another year or so for them to find a suitable match for you…you still have lot of time before you give up your bachelorhood". I feared it was going to be proved wrong.

The calls kept coming for next couple of days. As per the final tally, more than 50 calls came, out of which we shortlisted 15 proposals based on the details provided on call and in their corresponding matrimonial profiles. Dad then took these 15 profiles to our beloved astrologer to shortlist further. Going by his track record of rejecting proposals in the name of my horoscope, I expected him to cut the list down to less than 5.

But, he seemed to have already made enough money out of me. He approved 11 out of the 15 profiles. Dad & Mom then shortlisted again from the final 11 to first pick up proposals which were in and around Kochi. 4 profiles got shortlisted. Dad then got in touch with parents of these 4 gals and fixed 4-Sep-11 as the day for the "Pennu Kaanals".

Though I always keep telling Dad to note down the full name of the gals so that I could search for their profiles in FB and see if there are any mutual friends who could be recruited as spies, Dad always used to forget it. This time it was better, out of the 4 he had noted down the full name of 3 gals. I then searched for their profiles in FB to run my "Bungee-Jump Filter”. All 3 had put up pics of kids as their profile pics(these girls...I*^&^&%$&$^). Ironically, I couldn't also find any mutual friends in any of those 3 profiles.

Anyways, the momentum started building up. We had planned to go and see all 4 gals on the same day so that we could take a decision easily. However, the "Pennu Kaanal" of one of the gals had to be moved to 3-Sep-11 as they had some other plans on Sunday. This was the gal whom we couldn't trace in FB as we didn't have her full name.

On 3-Sep-11 afternoon, I ventured out for my Pennu Kaanal No.2, with Dad, Mom, Moll & Soorajettan. We didn't take Shreya as we didn't want to disturb her afternoon nap. Our destination - Alleppy. Name of the prospective bride – Shilpa **something**.

The gal's Dad had explained in detail the route to my Dad, mentioning each and every junction on the way. I was at the wheels. Dad and Soorajettan were playing the role of GPS by reading out the names of these junctions as we crossed them.

Finally we reached the place where her Dad was supposed to be waiting for us. There he was, tip-top in a pant and shirt. It was such a pleasant change from that old bald man in Mundu whom I saw in December last year during my Pennu Kaanal No.1. I was glad. The first impression was good. It may sound odd to some of you folks as to how or why should the appearance of the gal's Dad bother. Well, if it's a love marriage you would oversee all the shortcomings, but when it's an arranged marriage your eyes would join your parent's eyes and be on the lookout for shortcomings.

Anyways, after exchanging smiles he guided us to their place. While following his car, I started preparing myself from within for the onslaught. I knew that the moment we entered the perimeter of their house, all eyes will start scanning me, from top to bottom. Every move I make or every word I say would be analysed in detail. Probably Obama would know what I am talking about as he would have experienced it when he came to India early this year.

I stepped out of the car. I saw a lady smiling at us who I thought was her Mom. I greeted her and another elderly person, who was her Grandpa. As I was removing my shoes, I had this feeling that there were people at sniper positions aiming at me, one of them - the gal. The situation at ground zero was nothing short of an action movie. The action was just about to begin.

We entered their house which was quite nice and pleasant. I was the last one to enter and I saw the folks already sitting in the bilateral talks mode. To my right, sitting in a straight line were Soorajettan, Moll, Mom & Dad. To my left, were her Dad, Grandpa. Her Mom & another lady who was later introduced to us as her Aunt were standing next to her Dad & Grandpa. I was symbolically seated in the position of The Mediator, with the two camps sitting on my either sides.

The conversations in a Pennu Kaanal seem to be more like a Question-Answer session. Someone would ‘ask’ something and someone would ‘reply’ to it. This 'asking' and 'replying' will precede and succeed with lot of thought process. The person 'asking' will try to phrase the question in the mind and before letting it out would execute a sanity check to ensure that the question is sane and not controversial. Once the question is delivered another round of sanity check is executed to ensure that the release was fine. Emergency patches are applied in case any anomalies are identified in the question. The person 'replying' will analyze the question and frame a reply again ensuring sanity checks. After the delivery of the reply, emergency patches would be applied, if required. Though all this might happen in a few seconds, still the entire process wreaks havoc on the poor brain cells who have to slog overtime.

Her Mom fired a question at us, which set the brain cells in our camp on fire - "Where is Shreya?"

Expecting the gal’s Mom to know my name was fine. But expecting her to know the name of my niece was out of question.

"She was sleeping when we were leaving and we didn't want to wake her up from her sleep", Moll replied.

"Oh ok...well we have seen her pics in Abhinav's FB profile...she is really very cute...", her Mom replied.

"Oh..is it?", my Mom replied.

"Yeh, infact we have seen all of you in pics, in Abhinav's profile."

My Mom looked at me with a smile. Dad was looking elsewhere. I looked at Mom with this expression on my face - "See...see...I had told your husband to get the full name of the gal, but what happened??!!!"

The conversation aka question-answer-session continued with awkward silences in between. There was a window exactly at the opposite end of the room from where I was sitting. Couple of times, I felt as if there was a sniper aiming at me from there. But whenever I would bring my line of sight straight at it, it would vanish into thin air. Later I got to know that it was the main sniper – the gal.

Anyways, minutes passed by. Finally, the moment came. The gal made her entry.

Contrary to most of the Pennu Kaanals in the movies she wasn't in a Saree, instead she was dressed in a simple Salwar Kameez.

I looked at her. She looked at me. I smiled at her. She smiled at me.

Though it wasn't love at first sight, there was something special about her. She was different from the pics I had seen in her matrimonial profile. She had a beautiful smile on her face, and her eyes were full of life in them.

Dad initiated the conversation with her. I don't exactly remember what he asked. I guess my mind was too busy to record that.

"You had Onam celebrations in your office?", this was the first question I asked, if I remember it correctly.

"Yes", she replied.

"She had been complaining of pain in her legs due to "Thiruvathirakali", her Mom replied.

I could see the way she gestured her Mom in embarrassment, signaling her not to say all that in front of us. It was cute. She reminded me of a kid. I had to tell myself at times to keep my eyes rolling around, instead of having them stuck at her.

At one point there was an awkward silence for several seconds. I thought of pitching in and breaking the ice. "Let's have tea", I said to which everyone laughed.

All of us then moved to the dining room where the delicacies were waiting for us. As usual, I was the last one to get in and the seat left for me at the dining table was at the worst possible position considering where the gal was standing, I had to turn more than 100 degrees to my left to see her. Meanwhile, I was also introduced to her Grandma in the dining room.

Though there were many tempting things served at the table, my mind had no time to focus on them. I then asked her one of the many questions which I had already planned to ask her.

Me: "Do you know anyone from Rajagiri 2006 batch in your office?".

Rajagiri was the college from which I completed my engineering in 2006.

She: "Yes, I know Iswarya Vinod"

Me: "Heyn...who?"

I was expecting her to mention names of some other folks from my batch who were working at her office - TCS, Kochi.

She: "Iswarya Vinod"

Me: "I don't know anyone with that name in my batch"

She: "She was your classmate in college"

My brain cells were again set on fire at such unexpected responses.

Me: "Hmmm...no, there wasn't anyone in my class by that name. There was however another gal whose name was Iswarya Rajmohan"

She: "Yes, she got married recently and Vinod is her husband's name"

Me: "Oh yes yes...I know her. We were in the same class in college. How do you know her?"

She: "We work in the same project"

"When we searched for your profile in FB, we found Iswarya to be a mutual friend", her Mom added.

I looked at my Dad, again with that grunt inside for not getting her full name which we could have used to employ Iswarya as our spy.

"Oh....so what did Iswarya say about Abhinav? Did she say he was a spoilt brat in college?", Dad asked.

"No no...she has said good things about Abhinav", her Mom replied.

"Friends will always say good things only, right?", I pitched in.

The conversation continued. Many questions were running through my mind.

"Why didn't Iswarya tell me about this if she already knew it?"

"Last I heard from Iswarya was when she was working at Mumbai..when did she join TCS Kochi?"

"Iswarya had pinged me in gtalk last week but by the time I replied she was offline...did she ping me to tell about this?"

In the background I could hear the folks discussing about "Besan Ladoo", one of the delicacies served on the table, while my brain cells were gasping for breath. Some more question answers were exchanged, and it wasn't long before her Dad delivered the most awaited dialogue - "You both will have things to talk in person, right?". A glee appeared on my face. He then got up and asked us to follow him. He took us to a room which was adjacent to the hall where we were initially sitting.

The room had a bed, a computer table, a chair and a window from which I could see our car parked outside. While he was about to leave I was visualizing how I and the gal should be seated. I sat at one end of the bed and pointing towards the chair said - "please sit down".

"If you don't mind I shall sit here else it would be like an interview", she replied pointing towards the other end of the bed.

I was taken aback by the reply. I mean, usually in such a situation you would expect the gal to be overly shy, drawing the map of India using her toes as shown in the movies.

But, I liked it. This gal seemed to be frank.

I nodded and she sat at the other end of the bed.

My first Pennu Kaanal was some 7 months ago and I was not at all serious about it at that time. This time it was different. I had done my homework by asking my sister and friends on what sort of questions to ask and what not to. In fact I had sequenced the questions also in my mind. But all that was screwed up by the Iswarya Vinod episode. Our conversation started off with Iswarya and how they knew each other, followed by the cliché topics of hobbies, do you know cooking, do you know driving and all…

She told me that she had gone through my FB profile on the day her parents called my Dad seeing the ad in the newspaper. She also told me that she had gone through my blog and liked the way I write. She asked me why I didn't I write more frequently.

She was talking to me as if she knew me before. In fact, the way her Mom and Dad were initially talking to us gave us an impression that they knew us very well. All thanks to my FB profile, blog and the Iswarya Vinod factor which contributed to the "oh yes, we know you very well" feel from their end.

We would have spoken for around 5-7minutes. It was the best conversation I have ever had in such a short span of time. I ran my "Bungee Jump Filter" in my mind. Mike Tyson now had a hair on his head.

By the way, I also asked her the most important question – “What’s your full name?”

“Shilpa Ramachandran”, she replied. It had to be from her that I was destined to hear that name for the first time in my life!

As a closing note, I asked Shilpa whether she had anything to ask or tell me. She said she didn't have anything. I smiled at her and said, "let's go then".

While walking back from that room to the dining room, I remember my mind flashing images of the conversation, and to my surprise in all those images Shilpa's eyes stood out. The way she makes use of her eyes as she talks animatedly is just awesome. Anyone who meets her for the first time and talks to her for a couple of minutes, would definitely take note of those eyes. It's hard not to have them make their presence felt.

We got back to the dining room where everyone else was waiting for us. After a few minutes of conversation we decided to make our move.

I gave the keys of the car to Soorajettan asking him to drive back. I didn't want to drive as I wanted to sit back and replay the entire episode in my mind before I conveyed to them my opinion. But Soorajettan insisted on me driving back. I then got into my shoes and then into the car. While getting into the car I noticed the window of the room where Shilpa and I had our conversation. Later I got to know that Shilpa had positioned herself at the sniper position in that room earlier as we drove in. She then had to do a 100m sprint to get out of that room, cross the drawing room, dining room and then to the kitchen, before any of us could take a note of it.

As I put the gear in reverse I suddenly realized that I hadn't said a "good bye" to Shilpa and her family. I immediately got out of the car and apologized for not saying a proper bye. I took their leave, steered our car back onto the road. Everyone got in, and I looked at her for one last time. She was standing there, behind her mother with a smile. A sight worth capturing in mind for ever.

I don't remember precisely who was the first one to speak in the car. I guess it was Soorajettan. He said - "Kollam, eniky ishtapettu...nalla kutti...nammuk pattiya bendham..."(Good, I liked it...good girl...this is an apt alliance for us). The same sentiment was echoed by everyone else.

"What do you say?", Moll asked me. I said let everyone complete sharing their opinions in detail first. I listened carefully to every single word being uttered by each of them in favor of this proposal. It was good to hear the way they were sort of marketing the proposal to me. I looked at the rear view mirror as Mom was saying something, I could see Dad looking at me and smiling like a kid. They all seemed to have been swept away by Shilpa and her family.

Finally they asked me what did I feel.

"Enikyum ishtapettu"(I also liked), I replied.

The next big question I had in my mind was, what would we do about the remaining 3 Pennu Kanals which were lined up for the next day.

Me: "Dad, do we need to go tomorrow for the remaining 3?"

Dad: "Hmm...I would say we should go ahead with them. It won't be nice to call off at the last moment."

Me: "But then, we all liked this proposal, right? Why do we want to go and see those 3 gals, if we have already made up our mind?"

Soorajettan: "That's ok. Let's just go and see them also. We might either find a better proposal or we might eventually realize that Shilpa's was the best proposal."

That sounded logical.

As per the protocol, after a Pennu Kanal, if the guy's side liked the gal and her family, and are interested to proceed further, they would call gal's Dad and convey it. On the other hand, if the guy's side didn't like the gal or her family, they wouldn't call back. In short, Shilpa and her parents would have been expecting a call from our end. Soorajettan suggested that we call them in the evening and express our interest to proceed further, but I felt that it would be better to wait for another day. So, it was decided. We were to go and see the remaining 3 gals from the initial list on the next day and convey our decision to the best among the 4.

The first thing I did after reaching home was to search for Shilpa's profile in FB. There she was. The first gal to pass my "Bungee Jump Filter". Her wall and albums were private, unlike mine which were public. Hence, I couldn't find much apart from what she had given in her profile info.

I then called up Iswarya to discuss about this. She seemed to be in a hurry and told me that she would call me back later. I then texted her about the Pennu Kanal and told her that I wanted to know more about Shilpa. I also recruited couple of other spies who had links to her friends in school and college. I entrusted them with the job of enquiring about her and letting me know whether it was ok to proceed from our end. I got an immediate response from one of the spies in affirmative. Iswarya also replied saying that though she didn't know Shilpa much, to her she appeared to be a good gal. She said she will get the details from one of her colleagues in a day or two.

There was still a night left before taking, what was to be, the biggest decision of my life. To be frank, I couldn't sleep properly that night. My mind was replaying the entire event again and again, especially the parts that included Shilpa, the conversation we had in that room, her smile, her eyes...

I was trying to put myself in her shoes and imagining what would be going through her mind. There were only two possibilities:-
1. If she and her parents liked us, they would have been anxious to hear from us. In fact, they would have been disappointed that we didn't call them after returning.
2. If she and/or her parents didn't like us, they would not be much bothered about the call from our end.

The second seemed to be less likely, going by the fact that they knew almost everything about me and our family even before we stepped into their house, and also considering the warmth with which all of them interacted with us till the end. Assuming this I felt sorry for Shilpa, especially because during our conversation she had told me that mine was her very first proposal and I was the first guy to come and see her.

"Shucks, we should have called them tonight itself", I yelled at myself. I took my phone and checked the time. It was about to be 11PM. Bad time to wake up Dad and ask him to call Shilpa's Dad. Damn!

I got up early the next day and went down to the dining room where Dad was reading newspaper.

Me: "Dad, let's call Shilpa's Dad and tell them that we are interested to proceed further."

Dad: "Are you sure? We had planned to wait till the evening, right?"

Me: "That's alright. We shall just convey our interest. It's not necessary that they will respond to it positively."

Dad: "What if we like one of the 3 profiles more than Shilpa's."

Me: "We shall see that later. Let's just call Shilpa's Dad. They would have been waiting since we left their place yesterday."

Dad smiled at me and reached for his mobile. He dialed her Dad's number.

Dad: "Hello, I am Viswambharan, Abhinav's father."
.......
Dad: "We liked your daughter and your family. We are interested to proceed further. Do let us know your opinion whenever it's fine with you."
.......
Dad: "Oh ok...cool...that's nice to hear...so, when do you plan to come to our place?....next week? no problem...we shall be in touch...convey our regards to everyone there, especially Shilpa"

Whoooaaa....as Dad disconnected the call, it was crystal clear. They also liked us and this thing was going forward. Yeh, baby!!

As Dad was busy elaborating on his conversation with Shilpa's Dad, I was visualizing the situation at her end. She also would have been happy and relieved to hear a positive response from our end. Her eyes would have lit up with full of life in them.

For a moment, I asked myself whether this was happening and more importantly was I ready for this. I then used the logic that Dad and Mom would recite to me every time they tried to convince me about marriage - "we shall have engagement by year end or next year beginning and wedding only by the second half of next year".

But wait, there were still hurdles. Those 3 gals and their families who were waiting for us. I don't know why, but I hoped that none of them turned out to be better than Shilpa's.

It was as if God was in a very good mood that day, everything went the way I had hoped or rather wished for. We went to all 3 of them, none of the gals passed my "Bungee Jump Filter" and none of their Dads were in their pants, I mean they were in Mundu(one of them in Lungi ^&%%%$%#% ) instead of pants.

As we got into the car and drove out from the last house, Soorajettan summed it up nicely "Abhi, it was good that we saw all these 3 gals and their families, because now we can confidently say that Shilpa's proposal is the best one for us."

Meanwhile, I also got calls from the remaining spies who gave their thumbs-up for the proposal.

However, things were not finalized yet. I had to meet Shilpa's elder sister and brother-in-law next week at Bangalore, and her parents and close relatives were slated to come to our place on the following weekend. The first was fine as chances of it going wrong were very less. The second was crucial because it involved elderly folks and you never know how they could mess up things.

Meanwhile, with the approval of our parents, Shilpa and I added each other as friends in FB and started chatting. It was on 14-Sep-11, a day after I met her sister and brother-in-law. Before the final decision was to be taken by elders, we had 4 days with us to get to know each other and see whether we were really meant to be with each other for life. To our pleasant surprise, we both couldn’t find a reason as to why we weren’t.

Finally, on the evening of 18-Sep-11 the final verdict was pronounced to us - "Abhinav Viswambharan & Shilpa Ramachandran were to get married to each other".

When? Well this was tricky, since this was dependent on many external factors. I just wished it to be somewhere around mid of next year. Even Shilpa was expecting it to be around that time. But then, fate had something else in store for us. There were no suitable dates available after Jan-12 and before Sep-12, and parents at both ends didn't want to delay the wedding by a year. The final shocker came when we were told that no wedding halls of our choice were available in Jan-12, hence the wedding had to be moved to Dec-11!

So, we were introduced to our THE DAYs: Engagement on 30-Oct-11 & Wedding on 11-Dec-11.

It's been over a month since all this happened, and looking back at all this seems nothing short of a pleasant dream to me.

From time immemorial, the most common topic of debates, especially in India, has been "Love Marriage vs Arranged Marriage". Usually the young blood would tend to favor Love Marriage more than the concept of Arranged Marriage. Even I used to feel that falling in love with someone first and then thinking of marriage was more fun and way easier, than having your parents point to a stranger who matches a pre-defined criteria and forcing yourself to fall in love with her/him.

But, based on my experience, I can say that, the whole experience of Arranged Marriage can be as sweet as that of Love Marriage, if not more. Agreed, you are sort of taking chances with a stranger, but then so would be the case in Love Marriage when you meet the person for the first time with whom you would supposedly fall in love. In Arranged Marriage, you have backing of the entire family and you get license to fall in love without worrying about anything else.

Anyways, I don't wish to set off any debates or arguments here. All I want to say is I am thankful to God for the way things took shape in my life over the last several weeks. I thank Him for gifting me not just with a wonderful person in Shilpa, but an equally wonderful family in her's.

Shilpa,

I don't think I need to tell you how lucky we all feel to have found you, especially Dad & Mom who had only one thing in their mind over the last one year or so, and that was to find their daughter-in-law...I am sorry...their daughter.

I also don't think I need to tell you what I feel about you and how precious you are to me. Even if I were to put all that into words, a post in my blog won’t be enough for that. It would have to be in my book, which I now dream of writing someday with you by my side.

This is it. This is my story. This is our story. This is how I met my love. This is how I met you.

-AV

The Green Pepper Blunder

2011-07-17T21:03:00.048+05:30

It’s been 9 months since I last posted something on my blog. It wasn’t my pregnancy that was keeping me away from scribbling down things. Rather, it's attributed to the two zees in me – busy & lazy. There were times when I desperately wanted to write something, but was busy getting jacked with work. And then there were times when I had lot of time out of work, but I was too lazy to bang the keyboard and churn out a post.

Anyways, with my 2 year stint at Australia coming to an end last week, I hope to be back in action(only God would know for how long).

If you are among the ones who have read my previous posts, you would be familiar with the Blunder Man about whom I usually write. Back in Australia also he did a fairly good job in having himself land in awkward and funny situations. I had posted about some of them in the past, but there are some which haven’t seen the light of the day. Over the next few months I shall try to unleash them for you.

Let's start with an incident which I was reminded of today when I went to watch a Malayalam Movie named Salt N Pepper - a must watch if you understand Malayalam.

The incident dates back to the late 2009, a few months after the infamous "Barbara incident". This time the venue was a famous Indian Restaurant in Melbourne called Green Pepper.

It was a rainy evening and we guys were just returning after having a taste of a Bollywood Masala. I guess it was Ajab Prem Ki Gajab Kahani. It was quite late and we guys decided to dine out at Green Pepper.

Even though it’s said – “When in Rome, be Roman”, most of the Indians abroad hardly follow it when it comes to satisfying their taste buds. The closest we would get to Rome would be Burgers or Noodles. Period.

Every other party or outing we used to have, we would start planning for a non-Indian cuisine, but would always end up in an Indian Restaurant instead of the Greek, Spanish, Italian, Lebanese, Chinese, Japanese…options nearby. The classic example of this was when we went to New Zealand early this year for a 10 day trip and ended up having food from various Indian Restaurants for 7 days. Beat it!

Coming back to the incident - so, we were at Green Pepper, for the Nth time. It’s a small restaurant with a good ambience and awesome Indian food. Everyone who had been to that restaurant frequently during that time('09-'10) would remember a lady with a slight limp who was ultra-polite and gracious. From her looks, she appeared to be in her mid 30s. She always reminded me of Moll, especially her smile. Being regular visitors to the restaurant she probably was more considerate to us and ensured that we didn’t have to wait too long for our order to be served to us.

It was quite late that night and by the time we finished hogging it was almost 11PM. I went to her at the billing counter to pay the bill with my friend, that’s when the Green Pepper Blunder was played out.

She: "How was the food today?"

Me: "Awesome as always"

My Friend: "But, Malai Kofta was too sweet"

She: "Oh..ok...we will take care next time"

Me: "So, how much is it?"

She: "$XXX"

I gave her my card to swipe. It took some time, but the conversation continued.

Me: "So, where do you stay?"

She: "Frankston"

My Friend: "Oh, that’s 1hour from here. When are you planning to leave?"

She: "Hmm..in another 5minutes"

Me: "Ok, so you would reach home only by 12, rit?"

She: "Yeh"

Me: "Your kids will be waiting for you or they would have slept by then?"

She: "Excuse me"

Me: "Your kids…will they be still waiting for you?"

She: "I don’t have kids"

Me: "Oh.."

"Are you married?" – I was almost about to ask her, but some invisible power stopped me from digging my grave deeper. Probably it was my mind which has somehow got itself trained to take charge and do damage control in such situations.

Based on my learnings from numerous such incidents, the one and only action plan during such situations is to ESCAPE, but I had to wait for the stupid card reader to swipe out the amount from my card.

%$#%^&%$&^*(@~!+^*$%

I turned towards my friend for some support, but that jerk had already started charging at the rest of the folks who were just outside the restaurant, desperate about broadcasting to them the classic blunder which had just transpired.

*(*&$$##@#$%^%&*#@%

I continued waiting, without uttering a single world. It would have taken a few seconds, but they felt like hours. She gave back the card, probably with a smile. I didn’t have the balls to look at her face. I just said “Thanks” and ran out of the restaurant for my life.

-AV

The Lady in Blue....

2010-10-15T13:42:00.005+05:30

My tryst with stupidity and embarrassments continue…

After reading this you might even feel that I am just making up a story for folks to read and have a laugh. Well, as a writer one obviously can’t write anything and everything that happens in one’s life. There are things that you want to keep personal and there are things that you don’t mind sharing with folks around. But whatever I write, I write based on my experience, or at times sharing someone’s experience whom I know which I feel the world should know, like in my last post on meeting the CEO. But then, making up a story would be the last thing that I would want to do in my blog.

Anyways, all left at your discretion. I give a damn about it… :P

Well, enough of boring stuff. Coming back to where we started…yep, the tryst with stupidity and embarrassments….

Ever since we moved to our new apartment which is at a walking distance from our office, lunch time on most of the days is all about a 5mins walk to home, experimentation or rather exploration of cooking skills by me or my roomies, watching TV and walking back to office. On Thursday’s it’s even more special, with a Bollywood movie aired at noon in an Australian TV channel. Yesterday it was Bombay. I guess the last time I saw that movie was almost 13 years ago. Though there have been many movies on “National Integration” that followed it, none of them could match upto this awesome piece of work by Mani Ratnam. If you don’t have anything great to do during this weekend and are planning to spend time at home, try to get a DVD of this movie and see it all alone. I bet you would feel happy about spending a couple of hours of your life for something worthy.

Again diverting from the topic…..aaarrrggghh….

Where were we?…yes, lunch time…yesterday’s lunch time….that’s when the hell broke loose…man…wait…lemme come to it…we need to go a few days back…

Going back to earlier in the week, to be precise – on Monday afternoon, I and my roomie Vimal were on our way home for lunch. As we were midway and about to cross the road we saw a “chick” crossing the road from the other end. Needless to say, all gals you see around in Melbourne are fit enough to make it to any Hollywood flick. She was no exception.

Vimal, who is well known in our team as “Romeo” walked ahead of me as we started crossing the road. His eyes stuck on the chick. Well, he was not the only predator in the territory. He had a company in a Aussie dude who was coming from the other end, right behind the girl. He also had his eyes hooked on her. As she walked past our Romeo, I saw the dude smiling at Romeo. Before I could make sense of it, I heard him say to Romeo - “She is good, mate!”

I couldn’t help myself from bursting out into laughter as he winked at me and went past. My mind has this habit of rewinding and playing any funny scene that gets downloaded, over and over.

I was laughing all the way home.

I mean, it was so funny and cool. Just imagine, you are walking on a street full of strangers, you lock your eyes on a girl, another guy – a complete stranger also has his eyes locked onto the girl and he smiles at you and says something like that. It’s so funny. Well, if you are not able to see the fun, then you need to get lucky to see that happening.

Anyways, now let’s fast forward to Thursday afternoon.

Yesterday, it was my turn to cook. My first attempt at Baingan(Eggplant) Curry. There were a few things that I needed to buy before heading home. I left to a supermarket nearby called “Safeway”. Many Aussies frequent this place during lunch time as it has couple of small restaurants inside.

The Aussie crowd is quite unique, you can find majority of them dressed in Black. But as I stepped into Safeway this time, my eyes got themselves set on one of God’s most beautiful creations - a pretty lady dressed in blue. The color and tone of her dress was such that it remarkably stood out from the crowd inside Safeway. By her looks she probably resembled Salma Hayek. I leave it to you to gauge her “Oomph factor”. :P

Unlike Romeo, I made a conscious attempt at not having my eyes hooked onto her. As I went filling my basket with stuff to have the Eggplant curry served to Guinea Pigs at home, I noticed an Aussie guy who also seemed to have his eyes laid on the lady in blue. He reminded me of the cool dude we saw on Monday afternoon who had me in laugh with his “She is good, mate!” and the wink.

I continued going from one section to another and picking up things.

I entered the spices section, I saw the lady in blue. Gosh….she was so beautiful. “No dude no…don’t stare at her and give yourself up”, I told myself. As I put the last item in my basket and turned right to head to the billing counters, I saw that Aussie dude walking towards my end. The lady was on my left and he was coming from the right. I started walking towards him to the billing counters. He still had his eyes glued on her who was behind me searching for something.

I looked at him. He looked at me.

I smiled. He smiled back.

I winked. His eyebrows curled up. His smile still on his face.

With the scene of Monday afternoon’s incident with the cool dude being played in mind, I burped to him – “She’s gorgeous, mate!”, nodding very gently and unassumingly onto my left, hinting to the lady in blue.

“I bet she is”, he winked and walked past.

I don’t know why but I felt so elated. It was as if I had accomplished something great. I was now a cool dude like the one we saw on Monday. Yayi…!

The story wasn’t over yet. As I billed the items that I had picked up, I noticed the lady in blue come to the billing counter right next to mine. A few seconds later I observed that Aussie dude coming towards the billing counter.

He came and stood right next to the lady in blue. Man, these Aussie guys have so much of guts. They can befriend a girl that they haven’t met before in less than a minute. I have always been amused by the way they do it. I mean, you get into a tram, you see a couple of guys, then a couple of gals board the tram, the guys just start a conversation, and within no time all 4 of them have decided to go out for dinner or party!!

This guy seemed no different.

As I billed the last item and swiped my card, I just looked at him to strengthen the “dude-ish” relationship of ours.

He smiled. I smiled.

I raised my eyebrows a couple of times to indicate –“what’s up dude”

He winked his eyes.

Before I could wink back he said something which jolted me like anything.

Aussie Dude: “She’s my wife”.

Desi Dude: “Excuse me”

Aussie Dude: “She’s my wife dude”

Holy Crap!

The lady in blue turned and looked at me and the guy with a “what’s going on here” look. I just smiled at the guy and left with my stuff. I didn’t bother to collect the bills…I just wanted to vanish into a blackhole…

-AV

The day I met my CEO at...

2010-06-11T18:08:00.011+05:30

Me: “Do you have balls?”

She: “I am sorry”

Me: “Do you have balls to play?”

She: “What?”

Me: “Balls…beach balls, do you have them?”

Now, being from a small village in India, I don’t see anything wrong with the above conversation. But my Delivery Manager & Project Manager, with whom I went into a shop near a beach in Australia to get a beach ball to play, are from no small village.

“Damn it!...you have any idea what you just said inside?”, I had no clue what my DM was referring to.

“What Sirjee?”, I asked.

“Arey…how the hell don’t you feel anything odd in asking a lady whether she has balls?”.

It took a few seconds for my desi brain cells to decipher the oddness of the conversation.

Shucks!

Well, I at times can give the best clown in the town a run for his money.

But, what I am gonna share now with you all, is an incident that beats every stupid thing I have done till date, hands down…

It was an evening of celebrations at Infosys Australia(InfyA), with the Annual Awards night of InfyA’s biggest client. An evening where individuals and teams were recognized for their contribution towards the growth of the account. The event was held at an auditorium within Etihad Stadium – a footy/football stadium in Melbourne, which is at a few minutes’ walk from our office. We were lucky enough not to have any critical issues holding us back in office.

The function as usual, was formal. However the organizers had got a DJ to make the latter half of the evening informal. But, unlike the vibrant crowd at Bangalore DC, in here all ‘Uncles’ & ‘Aunties’ preferred to stay away from the dance floor, and the poor DJ probably ended up wondering whether folks took DJ to be Dumb Joker instead of Disco Jockey.

When it comes to celebrations/events at office, life at onsite isn’t as colorful as it is back there in Bangalore DC. It’s so very ‘dry’ and ‘dull’ here.

Nevertheless, our team had a reason to celebrate in the form of the Team Spirit award that we got.

After the formal function, it was time for us to munch. But before that, I wanted to pee!

I headed to one of the rest rooms. As I entered the rest room, I found it to be different. It didn’t have the usual ‘stand and pee’ partitions, instead it only had ‘toilet cubicles’(a term I got from Wikipedia).

Etihad stadium is quite popular in Melbourne, with all major Footy matches and Music Concerts held. It didn’t take much time to realize the reason behind the oddity of the restroom being different from the usual ones - it was because the stadium belonged to an Arab conglomerate that owns UAE’s Etihad Airways.

Lightening up oneself can give a heavenly feeling if one has been ‘holding it’ for a long long time.

As I got out of the ‘toilet cubicle’ with that ‘heavenly’ expression on my face, I had little clue to what was in store for me. I was near the dryer, drying off my hands when I saw a familiar face going past me.

Voila! It was our CEO.

Bumping into the CEO of the company that you work for can be shocking at times, more so if it is in a rest room.

But…it can be shattering if you and the CEO don’t share the same gender.

Yup, it wasn’t Kris. It was Jackie Korhonen – InfyA CEO !!

My eyes literally popped out from their sockets on seeing her walk into the restroom.

“What the…”,I yelled within myself.

“How is it possible?....%$^&**()())*&^&^%$”

Even though my brain was working at full throttle trying to comprehend what the heck was going on, my reflexes made me wish Jackie good evening.

What was her expression to it? Well, I leave it to your imaginations…

I was literally gasping for breath as I walked out. My theory of restrooms in Etihad being different seemed to be falling heads down. Even before the theory of ‘Unisex restroom’ could see the light of the day, I got out of the restroom and looked for the symbol on the door.

LADIES.

Holy crap!

-AV

PS: Time for the disclaimer –for once, it was not me landing into troubled waters, but my colleague(nicknamed Bhagwan) who had this once in a lifetime experience(also the one with the 'balls'). This happened over a month back, and till date we have not been able to stop ourselves from laughing out at it everytime somebody reminds us of it. I decided to pen down this incident for the sake of mankind. After all, colossal events like these are not meant to be kept in the dark. :P

The Princess turns 1...

2010-02-21T05:32:00.015+05:30

It's been over 7 months since I came to Melbourne, and in these 7 months there is one person whom I have missed the most in my life - Shreya.

Today, she completes the first year of her life. I still remember the day she walked into our lives. That has been the most beautiful day of my life till now. The day that changed our lives for ever.

Shreya would have added 1 year to her life, but she has also managed to reduce a few years from that of ours, with all the happiness that she so easily manages to infect people around her with.

When I was in India, I used to go every alternate week to Cochin, just to see her, to hold her in my arms. It was an amazing feeling to see her grow up.

I learnt a lot of things in those 5 months that I spent with her. I learnt how to hold a new born....how to put her to sleep...how to grab her attention...how to stop her from crying(not always)....how to guess that she was going to 'do it'(rarely)... :D

I even managed to learn how to change diapers!

While coming here, the saddest thing for me was the fact that I would miss seeing Shreya grow... :(

After coming here, internet has been the only means of seeing my angel. Moll and Shreya usually come to our place in Cochin once or twice in a month. Every time they come in, we catch up with each other through video chat. That's when I get to see my Shreya in action.

That's where I saw her sitting on her own for the first time...

That's where I saw her crawling for the first time...

That's where I saw her walking for the first time...

These days, when we video chat, she keeps running around the house, with Dad running behind her. Every chat session would usually end with a sore feeling - 'wish I could hold her in my arms'. :(

When I was in India, I used to capture almost each and every new move of hers, realizing the fact that I will have to travel to Melbourne soon. Today, the most prized possession that I have with me is my mobile, which has all those wonderful moments captured in it. Moments starting from her very first day in this world!

It is those moments that I use to fill the void in my heart. The biggest loss for me with this official trip would definitely be those moments that I could not spend with her.

With her Birthday approaching, I wanted to do something for her. I had initially thought of ordering gifts online. But, thanks to Karthik - my mentor at office, who had couriered gifts to India for his niece's birthday, I decided to send Shreya something from here.

I bought a few dresses, chocolates and a Teddy Bear for her. I also got a card for her in which I have inscribed my thoughts for her. She would not be able to make sense of it today, but I want her to read it years down the line and realize how badly her Uncle had been missing her and why he couldn't make it for her 1st Birthday.

The courier that I had sent from here, reached her on Friday. I am told that she is too fond of the Teddy Bear I sent and doesn't allow anyone to even touch it. :)

Today, as everyone gears up at Cochin to celebrate her 1st Birthday in a grand style, I can only close my eyes and try to imagine myself being there, seeing my Princess cut her 1st birthday cake with her Teddy Bear.

I am sorry Shreya for not being able to make it for your 1st Birthday. I wish I could be there. Whatever I had to tell you on your 1st Birthday, I have written in that card that I have sent you.

Miss you a lot sweetheart.

-AV

Barbara

2010-01-23T18:53:00.058+05:30

Keeping pace with the start made last week, I thought of sharing one of my funniest experiences yet in Melbourne.

The story dates back to September last year. On a fine Sunday morning, I and my roomie had a realization that we needed a hair cut, badly. Being pretty new to Melbourne and heading for our first hair cut in here, we were quite anxious and had no clue as to what was waiting for us.

As a small kid, I never used to bother about my hair cut. It was my Dad who used to take me to the hair dresser and tell them how to cut. I even remember him blasting some of the hair dressers. My innocent, naive, dumb headed fashion sense at that age could not figure out the reason behind my Dad's anger at those poor souls.

Time passed on and my hair dressers changed as we kept hoping from one state to another in India. Like any other teenager, trips to the hair dressers started having an additional purpose apart from getting a hair cut - scanning through all those movie magazines, which were forbidden at home.

By the time my fashion sense on hair cuts started maturing, I got more and more disappointed and frustrated with those self acclaimed style gurus. You tell them to cut in a particular way and in all likelihood they would cut it in a way which no way resembled what you had asked for. Thankfully, the search for 'The Talent of India' ended 4 years ago as I finally found a person back home in Cochin who could cut my hair the way I wanted it to be cut.

With the images of those shocker hair cuts in India flashing through my mind, the anxiety kept building up as we marched towards our destination. We had no clue as to who would be waiting for us with scissors, whether it would be a Desi or an Aussie. Whoever it was, I just hoped that he would not add to the list of disasters.

I started formulating sentences within my mind to convey to him in the best possible way, as to how exactly I wanted my hair to be cut.

'Men's Hair Cut for $9.95' - We saw a board at a distance. This is it. This is where our fate was going to be decided. We kept our fingers crossed as we reached the entrance of the Barber shop.

Voila!

I was completely taken aback by what I saw inside.

There were no Barbers, there were two ladies dressed up pretty hot inside the shop looking outside the glass door as we were walking in. I just took a step back and read the board again to make sure that we were entering the right shop. The board again read the same thing - 'Men's Hair Cut...'

"You guys want a hair cut? Come on in."

I looked at the source of the voice that came from the shop. Man, it was a chick in place of a Barber. A chick with scissors - Barbara.

With very little clue as to what was happening, I found my roomie heading straight towards the chair pulled out by the other lady.

Barbara invited me to her. I went and sat at the chair pulled out by her.

Barbara: Hey...how you doing?

Me: Not bad. How about you?

Barbara: Good good. So, how do you want me to cut your hair?

As my mind tried hard to comprehend a Chick in the place of those uncles in lungis back home in Cochin, it lost track of those sentences that it was formulating a few minutes ago...

Me: Hmm...cut on the side and back, don't cut much on the top.

Barbara: You mean side and back short and top medium.

Me: Yeh...yeh...

Barbara: Ok, cool. Sit back and relax.

As I sat on that chair and saw Barbara run her scissors left and right over my head, I couldn't stop myself from wondering as to what such a beauty was doing in a Barber shop. She should be walking on a ramp, or posing for the cover of some fashion magazine.

Barbara: Where are you from?

Me: India.

Barbara: Where in India?

Me: I belong to Cochin, but I work at Bangalore. Have you heard of them?

Barbara: Yes, I have heard of Bangalore.

Me: Oh cool. Where are you from?

Barbara: You tell me.

Me: What?

Barbara: Make a guess.

Me: Australia?

Barbara: No.

Me: Then?

Barbara: You tell me. Looking at me where do you think I belong from?

Me: You look like any other foreigner to me.

She couldn't control herself from laughing at that reply.

Barbara: Come on, make a guess.

Me: Hmm...Italy?

Barbara: No

Me: France?

Barbara: Naah..

Me: Ok...I give up.

Barbara: Sure?

Me: Yeh.

Barbara: Ok...you lost it. I am from Lebanon, but settled in Melbourne since bast 15 years.

Me: Oh cool...

The conversation went on for another minute or so.

Barbara: Done.

I looked at myself in the mirror - "Oh no...not again...". It was yet another disaster. She had cut a little too much at the top, even though I had told not to. :(

Barbara: How is it?

I would have kicked myself had I told the truth. I mean, how on earth could a guy give a lady like her a negative feedback, at least I couldn't.

Me: It's good. It looks good. Thanks.

Barbara: My pleasure.

I looked at my beloved roomie as I got up from my chair. I had company. His was yet another disaster in the making.

As we came out of the Barber shop, I and my roomie just looked at each other and burst out into laughter. More than the laughter at each other's disasters, it was for the wonderful experience that we both had at the shop.

That was my first experience with Barbara. The story doesn't end there.

Two months later, in early November, it was again time to get a hair cut. This time there were 4 of us heading to the same destination - 'Men's Hair Cut for $9.95'.

Soon after my first hair cut in Melbourne, my colleagues at office had told me the funda behind hair cuts in here. "It's all about 'Levels'. You should tell them to have 'Level 3' at the top and 'Level 2' at the sides and back."

Gaat it. I now knew the Aussie way of telling how to cut my hair.

While walking to the shop for the second time, I wondered whether I would get Barbara this time or it would be someone else.

As we 4 entered the shop, I saw a guy with scissors and the other lady who worked on my roomie last time. I couldn't see Barbara.

Before I could completely sink into the disappointment of not finding her, I saw her walking into the shop with her charming smile.

Without bothering about my friends, I got up.

Barbara: Hair cut?

Me: Yeh...

Barbara: Come on...

Wow...it was Barbara again...

Barbara: Hi

Me: Hi

Barbara: Have you been here before?

Me: Yeh...couple of months back.

Barbara: Oh cool...so, how would you like me to cut your hair?

Me: Level 3 at the top and Level 2 at the side and back.

Barbara: Are you sure?

Me: Yeh...

I was all set for yet another experience of getting a hair cut from a lady who would have easily made it to any Hollywood movie for her stunning looks.

Zzzrrrrrrrrrr....

Holy crap!!

I looked at myself in the mirror, with my eyes almost popping out from their sockets in shock. 3x6 inch of my head was now barren land, that too right in the front!!

She had run the trimmer right in the middle of my head.

I could have possibly withstood a bomb blast, but not this.

Me: Oh my God...what did you do?

Barbara: What happened?

Me: My hair...what have you done?

Barbara: You told me Level 3 at the top.

Me: Yeah, but that's not what you just did. You have literally shaved my head off.

I felt like ripping her apart, but...how could I?...after all she was a dumb damsel.

I turned to my left and looked at my 3 beloved friends - Harsh, Vinay & Rahul. I was expecting some sort of sympathy from their end, but all I could see was the 3 idiots bursting out into loud laughters.

Me: What do I do now?

I don't recollect the last time I panicked like that. I had no clue what to do. I...I...my hair...my...I didn't know what damage control could possibly be done?

Barbara: What do you want me to do now?

Me: Haan..?...I...I don't know.

I was going mad looking at the barren land right in front of my eyes, in the mirror. Jesus Christ!

Me: Harsh, what do I do?

I asked my friend who was being attended by the other lady.

Harsh: What can you do? Just ask her to do the same for the rest of your head.

Me: What? That would look really bad.

Harsh: What else can you do?

Oh man. There indeed was nothing else that could be done. Now, the best thing that was left to be done was to get it cut evenly all over my head.

Barbara: What should I do now?

Me: Cut it even all over.

Barbara: You mean Level 3 or Level 2?

Me: Level 3...Level 3.

Barbara: Ok.

My Barbara had let me down. She had given me the shocker of my life. No other hair dresser had ever dared to do what she had just done to my hair.

Unable to bear the pain of seeing my head being turned into a completely barren land, I closed my eyes. Barbara tried to start up a conversation.

Barbara: What happened? You didn't want Level 3?

Me: I don't know. I was told by my colleagues to tell 'Level 3 at top and Level 2 at side and back'.

Barbara: Did they tell you that you also need to specify 'with scissors or trimmer' separately?

Me: No.

Barbara: No wonder. Level 3 with the trimmer means 3 milimeters, with the scissors means 3 centimeters.

I now knew that it was not Barbara who screwed up things, but it was the same culprit that has being screwing up so many projects in IT - 'incomplete requirements'.

Barbara: Anyways, I am sorry for not asking you explicitly before cutting.

I felt sorry for her.

Me: Hey no...that's alright.

She continued the conversation, and after some time she said.... "Done".

I remember myself as a small kid, watching TV series like Zee Horror Show and Aahat through the gaps between my fingers that used to cover my face. Eventhough I was scared to look at those monstrous faces, I still wanted to see them through the secure fence of my fingers.

Looking at myself with mere 3 miliimeters of hair was getting scarier than what Ramsay Brothers could manage with those TV series.

As I opened my eyes and looked at myself, I couldn't control yelling out loud within myself-

"Holy crap!! Who the hell is this?!"

I had never seen me like that before....I mean with just 3 milimeters 'long' hair all over my head. It was then I realized that 3 milimeters was so so short.

Completely shattered, I got up from my chair and walked towards my friend Vinay who was waiting for his turn. Idiot he was laughing at my tragedy.

Barbara called him over to her. I went and sat at the same seat where Vinay had been waiting.

Barbara: How do you want me to cut your hair.

Vinay: Cut it any way, but not like that.

That moron said that pointing his finger at me.

Today, it's going to be almost 3 months since that tragedy, and what a journey it has been since then. I have been witness to so many faces bursting out into laughter on seeing me or rather the barren land on my head; not just for the 1st time they saw me after the disastrous hair cut, but the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th.....nth time.

Grrr...

- AV

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Date: 27-Jan-2010

As I initially wrote this post, I had mentioned the length of my hair after the disaster to be 3centimeters, instead of the actual 3 milimeters(corrected later). It took a comment from an Infoscion on my internal blog at Infosys for this self realization. I almost fell off from my chair when I read his comment "is it 3cm or 3mm...if its 3cm its fair enough rit?".

What an idiot, isn't?

Anyways, it was 3mm and not 3cm. OMG...that's toooooooooooooooooo short.... :'(

-AV
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Date: 29-Jan-2010

I had decided that I would not put a snap here of that tragedy. But thanks to intense pressure from all ends and threats from my teammates here that they would 'leak' it out, I had started thinking twice about my decision.

However, the following statement from one of my friends in Bangalore left me with no other choice- "Nee aan aanengil aa photo upload cheyyada patti...!!"(if you are a guy, upload that snap). The tone with which she said that really charged me up and I finally decided to upload a snap. Huh !!

The light from above in the lift has almost completely exposed my scalp in this snap taken by my roomie Vinay.... :C

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Enough...now stop laughing and get back to your business... :P

-AV
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The start

2010-01-16T18:35:00.026+05:30

Chaps...wondering where Grandpa had been for the past 10 months?

Well, thanks to a man in his life, he had to cut himself out from the world of words, that he so truly and deeply enjoyed being in.

A man in whose thoughts he has spent sleepless nights.

A man with whom spending 24 hours in a day seemed insufficient.

A man who brought him over 5,000 miles away from his home and dear ones.

A man who made sure that he spent lesser time with his family and friends than he used to.

Wanna know who the man is?

He is called "EMAN".

Naah...it isn't the new super hero in the block. It's the name of his project at office - Ethernet Metro Area Network aka EMAN. A part of his life which has made him distance 'himself' from his own 'self'.

Any sort of addiction is harmful, and work is no exception. And it is this addiction that he has been suffering from.

Whatever I am trying to say might not make much sense to people who aren't close to me. But, it would definitely make sense to my friends and especially my roommates, whom I have let down so many times by backing out from an outing/movie/dinner/trip because of my work.

In EMAN, I have been running almost like the carriage horse which has its eyes covered on the sides, with the path ahead reading out loud - "Work...work...work..."

You might be wondering why suddenly did I have this thought or realization. Well, it isn't something that came out of the blue. It's something that has been bothering me for quite some time and has been waiting for an opportunity to burst out. It happened this week with the culmination of the yearly performance rating process.

Though it's against the company policy to disclose any specific details of one's appraisal, I guess I would be staying within my limits when I say that it was one of the best appraisals that I have had till date.

When I look back at the year that 'was' - Professionally there is very little to be discontent. I got to learn so many things technically and experience a complete new world of possibilities as I landed in the land of Kangaroos 6 months back. But, on a personal front I guess it has been a very mediocre performance.

The very fact that I didn't pen down even a single post in here since the past 10 months is a testimony of how bad I fared. Though there were many incidents on which I wanted to scribble something, I could never sneak out time and make up a state of mind in the past 10 months to get the act together.

It's not that I didn't enjoy life in the last one year. I did. I had some of the most memorable days of my life with Shreya when I was in India. And, over here I found myself in a world which I had seen only in movies. I have been able to cover some of the best tourist places in Australia. I did enjoy a lot.

Still, apart from the short breaks from work while going to Cochin to my Shreya or going for trips in here at Australia, my life at large has been just revolving around work. There have been times when I have spent almost 30 hours working at a stretch.

I did get a handful of weekends without any work, but I had lost myself so badly in the world of office and work ,that, even on getting some free time I somehow could not take up to the one thing that I was so passionate about in my life - my blog.

I used to be a minute observer of things, of people, of thoughts, of emotions. And, it was through my posts that I used to relate to them and put them in perspective, so that in future I could look back at them and try to make sense of the mystery called 'life'. The satisfaction it used to give me was something that I can't express in words. That's something that only a person who 'creates' something of his own would understand.

Today, when I keep my appraisal sheet and my blog side by side and have a look at them, more than the happiness of a satisfying feedback it's the sadness of a dead part of me that fills up my heart.

Looking at the things that are lined up on the professional front for me, I really wonder whether I would be able to strike a balance with my professional and personal life anytime soon. However, as they say - to make a difference you need to start at some point.

This post of mine is that start.

-AV

Love at first sight

2009-03-09T21:28:00.010+05:30

Is there something called 'love at first sight'?

Well, till a couple of weeks back I believed that it was something that limited to just movies and books.

But then, this perception of mine was changed as a beautiful girl stepped into my life on a bright Saturday evening.

I have seen a lot of girls in my life, but never before had I seen someone like her. Someone whose beauty had so much purity and so much innocence in it. Beauty that I would never be able to do justice to by describing in words.

Today, her thoughts rule my mind. Her image flashes every time I close my eyes. She has a place in my heart that I have never given to any other girl. A place that to my very own amusement precedes that of my Dad, Mom, Moll or anyone else in my life.

It indeed was love at first sight for me. Her name, Shreya.

Fair enough for a build up. But I guess I won't be able to take it too far in a convincing way. Hence, let me put forth the spoiler for you...

The beautiful girl with whom I fell in love at the very first sight is my niece who walked into our lives at 4:10pm on 21st February.

I still remember seeing her for the first time as she was brought out of the labour room in the hospital, seconds after she made her way into this world. Draped in a white towel, with a tiny pinkish face, black hairs and her eyes closed tightly. She was a true personification of an angel.

In every sense, the most beautiful gift from God that I have ever got.

Though I was fine with a baby boy or a baby girl, deep inside my heart I wished it to be a baby girl. I even had a bet with my Mom on it, which I won.

Since it was on yesterday that we decided on the name for her, everyone at home has been calling her with different names - 'Shundari', 'Shunumani', 'Vaave'... I call her - Manikutti.

I have been looking forward to this post since that rainy evening of July 2nd, when Soorajettan(my brother-in-law) called me and told me that I would be an uncle soon. That evening is still afresh in my mind, as if it was yesterday.

I had initially thought of putting up a post at that time, but later decided to put it on hold till it happened.

Though this post was due since then, the chain of events that led to Manikutti’s birth seem to be taken directly from a movie. At least for me they seem to be. In other words, enough fuel for another long post from my end...

Manikutti's entry into this world wasn't that smooth. With her wedding, Moll had packed her bags from Chennai where she was pursuing her PhD along with a job in a bio-tech firm. After her wedding she got into a research firm in Cochin. It was during that time that we got to know that we would be having a new person stepping into our lives soon.

Moll continued her job, which slowly had a hit on her health with the baby going slightly below the expected rate of growth. Doctors warned us that if we didn’t pull our strings in time, things would go out of hand. As a result of this, Moll went on leave a little early. Slowly and steadily we managed to have the growth of our baby back on track.

The date for the delivery given by the doctors was Feb 22nd, Sunday.

With the delivery date on a weekend, I had booked my tickets to Cochin for Friday evening.

I usually call home at least twice a day - while starting for office and while returning back. On 18th(wednesday) evening, I called up Dad at around 945pm. From his voice I could make out that something was wrong.

They were in the hospital. I had spoken to Moll in the afternoon and she was perfectly fine then. I just wished that it wasn't time. It wasn't time for the baby to come into our lives. I didn't want to miss that special moment of my life. I wanted to be there when it happened.

Dad told that the baby would most probably come on the next day!

It was almost 10pm then and traveling to Cochin was not just possible. I also couldn't leave on the next day morning as there were a couple of things at office that couldn't do away without my presence. The only option left was to travel on the next day(thursday) evening. I rushed home and logged onto irctc.co.in to book train tickets. Luckily there were some Tatkal seats left on one of the trains.

I somehow managed to sleep for a few hours that night. On Thursday, I called up Dad early in the morning to check the situation at the hospital. He told me that by 10am we would get a confirmation on baby's arrival.

I spoke to Moll. "Just hang in there...if possible and don't let it out till I reach there...I want to be there with all of you..."

She just smiled to it and asked me not to worry about anything.

There was another thing that was sort of bothering us. Dad had an official tour of 2 days, which was quite critical for him. He had to leave in the afternoon and was supposed to be back only on Saturday afternoon. That would be two long days in such a critical situation.

Being the son of a person who has two wives - one in my Mom and the other in his work, I knew that he had to go.

Having been in Infy for close to 3years I understand that at times one can't help but let the professional life take precedence over personal life. I could imagine what Dad was going through at that time. But then, all of us pushed him to go ahead with his tour. His flight was in the afternoon.

It was 10am. I called up Dad to know about the baby.

Dad: "Good news for you...it won't be there today...!!"

Yeahhhh....I was on cloud nine. I would be there. I would be there while history would be in the making.

The doctor told us that it would be on Saturday. Dad also was happy as he would reach back on Saturday evening from his tour.

Considering the unexpected nature of the Bangalore traffic, I had thought of leaving office at 430pm. But as luck would have it, I managed to pack my bag and run for the bus only by 520pm!

90minutes remained between me and my train.

At the Infy bus stop, there was the BMTC Volvo bus to Majestic that I usually take. The bus started at 525pm. I asked the conductor as to when would the bus reach the station. "By around 6:30-6:40 Sir", he replied.

That was quite close. It was the same train which made me run like a dog in the streets of Bangalore last year.

What if I couldn't make it in time?

No way...this time I had to be there at Cochin by next day morning, come what may...

As these thoughts ran through my mind, I got a call from Dad.

Dad: "Where are you?"

Me: "In the bus to the station Dad..."

Dad: "Are you late? "

Me: "Not really...how about you? where are you now?"

Dad: "I just reached Mumbai...my flight to Rajkot is in a few minutes..."

Me: "Oh cool..what time will you reach there?...hello...helloo...Dad...can you hear me...?"

The call got disconnected. I tried his number, but it was out of reach.

I sent him a message - "Have a pleasant journey, Grandpa..."

I looked out of the window. The bus hadn't covered much of a distance. Time - 545pm. Just one more hour to go.

Reaching Majestic before 650pm seemed to be impossible now, given the fact that peak traffic of the evening was about to build up. The next best option was to get in from another railway station at Bangalore - K R Puram, where the train would reach at 715pm. That's a gain of 25 precious minutes, when compared to the train’s departure from Majestic.

I took out my mobile and dialed my roommate Binu's number. I checked whether he was busy. He seemed to be winding up his day's work. I explained the situation to him, and his reply was straight and simple - "Let's go to K R Puram in my bike".

We decided to meet at Madiwala, from where Majestic and K R Puram would take almost the same amount of time to cover. But then K R Puram offered the gain of 25minutes.

Evading the traffic and the pot bellied traffic uncles was fun and exciting, with minutes ticking by. Finally when I reached the station, I had luxurious 20minutes to spare.

While I waited for my train, I got a call from Dad.

Dad: "What happened?"

Me: "I reached station"

Dad: "No…not that...your message...you said 'Grandpa'...did it...?"

Me: "Oh...no no...nothing happened...I wrote it just like that..."

I couldn’t stop myself from laughing out loud at his excitement.

After a long time I was travelling alone in train, something that I don’t like. But then, I didn’t realize it much this time as my mind was completely loaded with thoughts about the 3 precious days of my life, that were to unfold in Cochin.

After reaching Cochin, I went straight to the hospital.

First thing that Mom said on seeing me at the hospital was - "See, Moll held it for you..."

I looked at Moll. She had that beautiful smile on her face. It indeed is true when people say that a lady’s beauty gets enhanced when she is carrying.

Within a few minutes I realized that there was one funny thing that was bothering almost everyone there. It was to do with the timing of the delivery. As per some astrological calculation, if the baby took birth before 1245pm on Saturday, baby's Dad and Uncle would be screwed. The Uncle would be screwed pretty badly compared to the Dad, if that happened. That meant I would be screwed based on the baby’s time of birth.

I sort of felt sorry for her and the baby. But since doctor had told that nothing would happen on that day, all were kind of relaxed.

I asked Mom to go to office as I was there at the hospital. It was after a long long time that I and Moll got plenty of free time to sit together and talk, or rather rewind back to those good old days that we spent together as kids. It was fun to walk down the memory lane.

Time just flew by...

The doctor came in the afternoon and told that Moll would be taken for delivery next day morning. Moll was a little upset to hear it, for two reasons - Dad not being there by then & me getting screwed up if it happened before 1245pm.

I somehow tried to make her understand that no matter what we did, eventually only God's wish would happen.

Every time the doctor would come for rounds, the nurse would let us know beforehand so that we could walk out, leaving Moll inside. It was during one such walk out in the evening that Mom and I were witness to one of the most tragic incidents that I have ever seen in my life.

As we waited for the doctor to come, we saw nurses rushing into one of the adjacent rooms. Things seemed to be pretty serious. The doctor then rushed to that room. Mom and I looked at eachother and wondered what was wrong. I thought the lady in the room was about to give birth.

After a few seconds the doctor came out of the room, and asked a guy to follow her. I looked at that man as he walked past us. He seemed to be the husband of the lady inside the room.

The doctor took him to a corner near our room, and following were the words that came out from her end: - "I am very sorry to say this, but your wife's pregnancy cannot be continued. It needs to be aborted..."

Having come a long way from that rainy evening of July 2nd when I got to know about the baby, to a day prior to it actually happening, I knew what it meant to lose one’s child before it actually came into the world.

He walked back to his room, crossing us. I just had a glimpse of him. Tear drops rolled down his face. That expression on his face somehow reminded me of one of those famous faces of Godhra riots. He went into his room and we started hearing loud wailings. It was that of his wife.

I looked at Mom. She was already in tears.

After giving instructions to the nurses, the doctor got into our room, and we continued waiting anxiously.

I asked Mom to go and check with the nurses as to what happened to the lady in the adjacent room.

They told her that the lady who was 5months pregnant had been brought to the hospital due to bleeding. And it turned so bad that the Doctor took the final call of aborting the pregnancy, to save her life.

While the doctor was still in our room, we saw that man coming out from their room and going to the other extreme of the corridor. He sat down on the floor and started crying like a kid.

That was a very painful sight. It is rare that you see a man of his age crying like that. His pain indeed was unsurmountable.

Mom and I decided not to speak about this incident to anyone.

The doctor came out of the room and smiled at us. We got in. Moll seemed to be upset.

Mom: "What happened?"

Moll: “They confirmed that I would be taken to the labor room tomorrow morning at 8”

Mom: "That's perfectly fine. We need to do whatever the doctor says. Forget about those astrological things..."

That night I and Mom came back to our home, leaving Moll and Soorajettan at the hospital. While driving back, Mom was very quite, which was unlike her normal self. I just looked at her a couple of times, she appeared to be very upset. I knew what was going through her mind at that time. It was that tragic incident at the hospital. We didn’t speak much while driving.

I am not sure whether she slept properly that night. Though I also was little worried, the tiredness of the overnight journey saved me from some agony in the form of sleep.

Next morning was 'The Day'. The day when a set of new relationships were about to be formed. The day when I was about to lose my throne of being the youngest at home.

As usual, Mom got up at 5am and prepared breakfast and lunch for everyone. We spoke to Dad and he seemed to be very excited. His office work had got over and he was on his way back. His flight was scheduled to reach Cochin at 1:30pm.

Mom and I packed everything and drove back to the hospital.

At the hospital Moll was getting ready for the final assault. She was taken to the Labor room at around 830am. Soorajettan and I accompanied her till the entrance of the labor room. We were told that it might take 4-12 hours for the baby to finally come out.

One good thing about the hospital was that it was less crowded.

Apart from me, Soorajettan and Mom only two others were there in the corridor in front of the labor room. It was that man from the adjacent room and his brother-in-law. Soorajettan told me that he spoke to that guy in the morning. They told him that, they had asked the doctor to see whether they can have a premature birth of the baby and have it grow up in the neo-natal care at the hospital.

Soorajettan’s Mom came in. I was relived as Mom would now have company in her. We asked them both to go back to the room instead of waiting outside.

It was around 1030 that the Doctor came out from the labor room and called Soorajettan. I rushed to them to hear what she had to say.

Doctor: “I am very sorry, but we can't have this baby. We had to take into consideration your wife’s health. If the baby takes birth, it will have deformities”.

I…I can’t put into words what I felt on hearing it. At first it seemed like a bad dream, but it wasn’t. I just wished it was. I mean, how could this happen to us...how could God be so cruel...

All our hopes, our dreams were shattered in one instance. I sort of lost my senses.

“You are Jyotsana’s husband, rit?”, asked the Doctor.

“No, I am Susmitha’s husband”, Ettan replied.

“Oh…I am sorry…I am very sorry….Susmitha is perfectly fine, and she has started getting pain….I am so sorry, I thought you were…I am extremely sorry”.

I don’t know the exact count of the sorry that were uttered by that old lady, but it would have been more than 10 I guess.

Well, had she not been Moll’s doctor I would have fired her like anything. Soorajettan and Moll had been visiting her regularly since past several months, and she still couldn’t recognize him! I have known doctors who form a close relationship with all their patients, but this was ridculous. How the hell could a lady of her age and stature do that? Anyways, let's cut the crap.

We were glad that everything was fine. But, at the same time we sort of got to know what that man, about whose kid the doctor was talking about, would be feeling. Death seemed to be easier than it. It was to be his first kid. My prayers go out for him and his wife. May God bless them and their family with enough courage to tide over that tragic incident, and get back to life at the earliest.

As we waited anxiously to hear something about Moll, time seemed to move at a very slow pace. I and Soorajettan walked left and right in the corridor, for hours.

It was

11…12..1215…1230…1235…1240…1241…1242…1243..1244…1244.5…1244.75…1245!!

The baby hadn’t come. I got saved from getting screwed up. :D

But then, there was yet another milestone. Dad had to reach the hospital in time. Thankfully his flight was on time, and he reached hospital at around 2pm.

A fair enough crowd of relatives had gathered outside the labor room by then.

Every time we saw a nurse coming out from the labor room, our hearts would start thumping harder. They would just smile at us.

I, Soorajettan and his sister- Sangi Chechi were waiting right outside the entrance of the labor room. The grandpas and the grandmas to be were waiting at a distance.

It was around 4pm, when we saw the nurses running left and right on the other side of the glass door. Baby was on its way. We waited anxiously. Minutes ticked by.

Finally, at about 10 past 4, we saw a nurse coming towards us with the baby wrapped in a white towel in her hand.

She opened the glass door, and said with a mesmerizingly beautiful smile – “It’s a baby girl”.

I looked at the tiny thing in her hand. It was “The Most Beautiful Moment of My Life”. It was my Manikutti, for whom we all had waited for so long. I just had a glimpse of her and stepped back to let Dad, Mom and others to have a look at her.

I was an uncle now. Uncle of a beautiful baby girl. It’s a feeling that cannot be described in words, but can only be felt. I still remember that sight, it’s something that I am never gonna forget.

Manikutti’s arrival has marked the beginning of a new phase in our lives. For the first time after joining Infy, I am going home to Cochin on 4 consecutive weekends. Not that work is not there, but I don’t want to miss out on even a single moment that I could spend with my Manikutti.

This is the girl with whom I fell in love at the very first sight...

Shreya, welcome to this new world. Even before you stepped into this world, we started dreaming about you and our life with you. You were born not to just any other girl, but to the most understanding and loving girl I have ever come across in my life. She has been much more than an elder sister to me. You are also blessed with a very caring Dad in Soorajettan, for whom you and your Mom are the most precious thing in this world. In fact, you both are his world.

What makes you even more special is the fact that you are the first grandchild to Dad and Mom, and hence you will always have a very special place in our family.

By the time you grow up and read this post, I would have married someone and probably you would have a cousin to play with. But then, you are...and will always remain the girl with whom I fell in love at the very first sight, for the first time in my life.

I love you, Manikutti.

-AV

Incomplete Stranger

2009-02-16T22:25:00.014+05:30

It's been a long long time since I penned down something in here. Some of you mailed me, and some of you even called me to check whether I was alive. Well, I am still alive and kicking. And, I haven't stopped writing. In fact I have written a lot in the past 4 months, it's just that they were confined to the design documents and official mails at office.

Lot of things happened in the past 4 months, some good, some bad. I had thought of scribbling them down here, but then time was a liberty looming at large, far out of my reach.

Nevertheless, something happened last Friday, which I thought I should put up here for you and my grandchildren to read. It's about the girl in my bus.

Catching the office bus on time in morning is a challenge in itself, more so when you stay with a bunch of lazy bachelors who at times spend hours in the bathroom. To top it, the water would get over when it's my turn, and I have to yell out to my beloved lazy lames to hop down to the ground floor and switch on the motor.

There is no particular time that I reach my bus-stop. It keeps switching. But then, there are some familiar faces in the bus which I see regularly. One among these faces, is of a girl who boards from my bus stop. Like others, we have seen each other in campus as well, and hence we are not complete strangers to one another.

Coming back to the incident...

Though, since past several months I run to catch the last bus back home after clocking over 12hrs a day, this Friday I managed to leave early from office. In the bus I had company in my colleague, Tina, who with her friend was planning to shop for her husband's younger brother, from a shop that was near my place.

As we boarded the bus, we realized that there was no chance of getting a 3 seater. We eventually figured out a 3 seater and a 2 seat in the third last row, having a guy and a girl, respectively. Tina sat on the 3 seater and I sat on the 2 seater, next to the girl. She was one of those familiar faces. The girl from my bus stop.

Being a Friday evening, that too Valentine's Day eve, buses were getting crowded at a fast pace. We were waiting for Tina's friend to get in. As we waited anxiously, couple of people came looking for the seat available in Tina's 3 seater. At first, she somehow managed to direct them to free seats at the back saying that she was waiting for her friend. But then, she had to finally give up, as all seats at the back got filled.

In case her friend managed to board the bus in time, I thought of offering my seat to her. As the bus was about to leave, three girls rushed into the bus. One of them was Nazia, whom I had met a couple of weeks back.. Tina's reaction on seeing her was - "Heyn...these people are also there?".

I could deduce that all 3 were together. I asked Tina whether I should get up. She said it was fine, and that they 3 would prefer standing than having one of them sit.

It was then followed by the usual "hi...hello..." with Nazia and the other two.

As the bus got out of our campus, I took out my companion in the bus, my mp3 player and plugged the earphones into my ears.

Just then I felt as if the girl sitting next to me was sobbing, or probably she was having a bad cold. I assumed it was the latter. But, as minutes passed by the former grew stronger in probability. Turning my head towards her and getting a confirmation was out of question, as I personally get pissed off on seeing people look that way at others from such close proximity.

Still, I somehow wanted to know whether she was really crying. Tina was the best person to figure it out for me, as she was sitting in the same row. But, with the noise around and her friends standing between us, it was difficult for me to convey it to her. I then thought of sending her a message. The message read - "Is the girl sitting next to me crying?"

After sending the message I waited for Tina to take out her mobile from her bag....

No way...that dumbo didn't realize that I had sent her a message. I then thought of giving her a call, hoping that her mobile was not in silent mode. She seemed to realize that somebody was calling her. I cut the call. She took out her mobile. I saw her turning her head in our direction, evidently to clarify my doubt.

I then looked at Tina. She nodded in affirmative, the girl sitting next to me was indeed crying.

"What did he do to her?", Tina's friend cracked a joke to her, which she later told me. :D

I felt sorry for the girl. But then, I thought it would be best to ignore it. Minutes passed by and I got engrossed in my mp3 player. After about 15minutes, I opened my eyes to the jolt of one of the bumpers. The girl still seemed to be sobbing.

It would have been something terribly bad that had the girl crying for a long time. I wanted to do something about it. It was not because I had any sort of feeling for her, but then she was one of those familiar faces that I usually see in my bus everyday.

"Ting ting...ting ting". I got a message from Tina - "Any plans to comfort her?". I turned towards her and just smiled.

Some of you would say I am crazy, but then I decided to pitch in with something to lift the spirits of that girl.

What do I do? What do I do?....Hmmmm... Should I ask her "Are you Okay...?"....naah....

Should I ask Tina to sit at my place and talk to her?....Hmmm....naah...

What do I do?

Shall I send her a message from my inbox wherein I have saved some good forwarded messages?... Ok...but how? I didnt know her number….

Shall I ask her for her mobile number and then send her the message? :P

Bad idea!

Well....what else...what else....

How about showing her the message on my mobile, instead?...

Wow…that sounded practical....but....how would she react to that?

The crowd in the bus had thinned a bit, and Tina's friends got seats. I knew that the girl sitting next to me was not from Kerala, and hence wouldn't understand Malayalam. I turned to Tina and whispered to her in Malayalam my plans. Tina smiled and said it would be good, in fact she found it to be ‘sweet’.

That was it. That cleared whatever doubt that was left in my mind over my plan.

The only thing that remained to be answered was the timing of the execution of my plan. Well, you really don't know how a person, who has his/her emotions running high, would react to an act like that from a stranger. I didn't want to take any chances. I had earlier planned of getting down one stop ahead of my usual bus stop, to shop for some grocery items. I thought of putting my act together just before getting down at that stop.

I opened the inbox of my mobile and took out a message that was sent to me by one of my juniors in school recently. That seemed to be the best suited message for her at that time.

Tina and Nazia got down at the stop before the one I was supposed to get down. Tina wished me luck and asked me to call her on getting down from the bus. I asked about her other 2 friends, she said they would get down at the last stop.

Our bus was now at a traffic signal. I waited for the lights to go green. Meanwhile, my mind started calculating the various endings of my action. Smile from her. Thanks from her. An angry stare from her. Thrashing from her....What if she wasn't crying at all, and it was her bad cold that faked up everything? Angry stare for sure… Man, it was a tough call.

Anyways, the lights went green. Our bus started. It was now time to rock and roll...

Me: “Excuse me. Can you read this?”

She took out her earphones.

Girl: “I am sorry…..”

Me: “I said, can you please read this?”

I gave my mobile to her. She took it from me and started reading it.

I read that message again from my mobile that was in her hand...the message read - "Beautiful Quote - 'Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person, is like expecting the Lion not to attack you because you are a Vegetarian. Gudnite. :)".

Though I myself felt better after reading it, I didn't know how would she react to that.

She finished reading it and gave back the mobile to me. I looked at her. She had a blank expression on her face, her eyes still moist.

Me: "Don't take me in the wrong sense. I see you usually in the morning bus, and I found you to be too upset, hence just thought of sharing this message with you".

She didn't reply back. Same blank expression. I didn’t know how to react to that. I somehow managed to bring out the following words…

Me: "Don't worry. Everything will be fine. Bye."

She didn't respond.

I got up from my seat, turned back to the last row where Tina's other two friends were sitting. I waved at them and started walking towards the door. As I walked, I tried to recount the exact expression on that girl’s face. Her blank expression couldn’t convey anything clearly. Was it surprise, was it anger, was it consolation...

I really didn't know.

Whatever it was, I didn’t care much about it. In fact, I don't care even if she would have mistaken me to be some sort of a flirt trying out his luck on the eve of Valentine's Day, because for me remaining ignorant of the person sitting next to me who seemed to be crying and deeply hurt, was more concerning. Even if it was a guy at her place, I would have done the same thing.

After reading this, some of you would say that I was wrong at intruding into her 'personal space'. That’s a valid point. I may have been wrong.

But, what do we do when we see tears in our friend’s eyes? What do we do when we feel the pain of people who are close to us? Don’t we try to comfort them? Don’t we try to do something to ease their pain? And these might be people whom we get to see probably once in a month or even an year.

What about those faces that we see daily in our life? Near our house, in our bus, in our campus, near our cubicle…faces that pass by us more than the one's back home that long to see people like me at least once a month?

Are they just faces for us? Or do they have a soul behind them? Yeah…yeah…who has time to care about all that. Agreed. Even I can be pinned into the category of people who ignore these faces, as strangers.

But then, there have been instances where some of these faces have caught my attention, the most striking among them was of Amit Budhiraja, the Infoscion who killed his wife and committed suicide last year. His was one of those familiar faces in my bus. Seeing his photograph on the news channel and newspapers was really painful.

That was an incident that made me realize that they were not just familiar faces but had a soul of their own.

I don't care about right or wrong. On that evening, in that bus, seeing that familiar face in tears was something that forced me to intrude into a stranger’s ‘personal space’.

A stranger, who wasn’t a complete stranger to me.

Hope she has recovered from that.

-AV

Is this some sort of a prank?

2008-10-25T16:39:00.012+05:30

Tring...tring...

Why the hell is the phone supposed to ring when you are in the midst of fixing something? Something that has had you banging your head on the keyboard since morning. Grr...

As my hands reach the desk phone in my cubicle, I just hope that it isn't yet another call offering a life time free credit card.

Me: Hello.
Voice on the other end: Hello. Is this Abhinav?

Who said Vishwamitra-Urvasi stories are things of the past? Even today, it doesn't take much time for the sweet voice of a lady to take away the attention of a guy from his work.

Me: Yes, speaking.
Voice on the other end: Hi Abhinav, this is Akshita.
Me: Hey...

I have a batchmate in Infy with that name, but the voice somehow didn't seem to resemble hers.

Akshita: I have a doubt in Oracle. I am trying to retrieve a set of values from the table based on......I am not getting any results.

I was so busy analyzing her voice for a pattern match that I didn't pay attention to what she was saying.

Me: Ah…I am sorry, can you just repeat that?
Akshita: I am trying to retrieve a set of values from the table based on the start date and end date. But when I execute the query I am not getting any results.

In the past, I have been fooled quite a number of times by some of my old project-mates, especially over the phone. It had to be one of those jerks.

Me: Is this some sort of a prank?
Akshita: What?

Me: Are you trying to play some prank on me?
Akshita:No. I got your name from K-Shop.

For those who don't know, KShop is the industry famous knowledge management initiative at Infosys. It's an online application which has technical and domain specific articles, contributed by Infoscions over the years.

Me: What??? From where??
Akshita: KShop.

Now, that's a shop which I hardly visit. In fact, if I remember it correctly I paid a visit to it more than a year ago. Anyways, I was certain that it was a prank on me. I thought of playing along.

Me: KShop? Well, that's very funny. I haven't submitted any of my articles to KShop till date.
Akshita: I am not lying, I seriously got it from there.

Me: You got my name from KShop? From which article?
Akshita: Not from an article. Your name was there in the database experts list.

Me: Database what?
Akshita:Database expert.
Me: WOW! That's really great.

The voice patter recognition application was still running in the backgroud.

Akshita: Abhinav, can you help me with my query?
Me: Come on. I know it's a prank on me. May I know who this is?
Akshita: Forget it. I will try some other option.

Me: Hey…wait…wait… What was your issue? You are not able to fetch results from the database for your date range query, rit?
Akshita: Yes.

Me: Well, I had come across this problem during my training, not sure whether this is what you are looking for, but make sure that the search string in the query is in the same format as given in the database.
Akshita: They are in the same date format.

Me: Did you use the string-date conversion function to convert the search string into date format and then search?
Akshita: I tried all that, but it's not working.

Me: Ok. Just google for it. You will get a solution.
Akshita: Yeah, I did that. But, couldn't get a satisfying solution that's why I got into KShop.

Man, what more am I supposed to do. Somehow, I was still expecting her to burst into a loud laughter and say that she managed to fool me.

Me: Are you seriously not playing a prank on me?
Akshita: I have already answered that.

Anger doesn't suit girls.

Me: Ok…ok…do one thing. Drop me a mail stating the problem that you are facing. I will reply to it.

Now this was a trap for her. I expected her to finally agree that she was playing a prank on me. But, she didn't.

Akshita: Ok. Thanks for your time.
Me: Ah…yeah…that's fine. Send me a mail.
Akshita: Yeah…bye.

Before I could say anything, she hung up.

"Shucks, who the hell was that", I scratched my head.

Idea!

I opened our online telephone directory at Infosys. I keyed in her name – Akshita. It gave two search results. One was my batchmate and the other was a girl in Chandigarh.

I thought of waiting for the mail.

5 minutes went by. No response.

With a little hesitation, I pinged the lady in Chandigarh and asked whether she had made a call seeking help for some Oracle query. "No", came the reply.

This was for sure. The lady with whom I spoke over phone was indeed playing a prank on me, though she didn't accept that till the end.

"KShop...Database expert... Me....", what a realistic story!!

Somehow, I felt like paying a visit to the Shop of Knowledge, just out of curiosity.

I clicked on the link to KShop.

It was like the scene from the movie Main Hoon Na, wherein Zayed Khan steps into his college library for the first time. The temple bells start ringing. Beautiful girls line up on both sides of the pathway and shower flowers.

I searched for my name.

>Search Knowledge Assets: "Abhinav Viswambharan"
>Results: "No documents match your query"

That was an expected outcome for my search query.

I then browsed through the portal and came across one link:- "Find Expert".I thought of exploring it further. Locate an Expert> Technology> Databases> Experts List.

What got rendered in my internet explorer was no less than a bomber.

Experts for the Knowledge Topic : Databases

Abhinav Dahiya
Abhinav Govind
Abhinav Viswambharan
.
.
.
My eyes almost came out from their sockets at the breaking news.

I selected my name and clicked on "Get Details", and found entries that resembled the entries in my Skill Centrale(an online application, where employees are supposed to keep updating information regarding their technical skill set regularly), which I had recently updated. I had actually dug a pit for me by doing that.

Man, I was an expert. A database expert at Infosys!

Bu hu ha ha ha ha ha...

I couldn't control laughing at the biggest joke of the year.

Anyways, as things started to fall in place, I realized that whoever was that lady on the phone, was not playing a prank on me, though she might have given a false name.

The irony is that, all the while I kept playing safe thinking that she was trying to fool me, but eventutally I did get fooled by myself, everytime I asked her "Is this some sort of a prank?" :D

-AV

A surprise gift from God!!

2008-10-04T18:57:00.005+05:30

Last Friday was a day which I would cherish for the rest of my life. It was on this day that I got a chance to receive an award from the person whom I admire the most after my Dad and NRN. It was the prestigious Infosys-CME Excellence Award, won by my previous project team under the “Business Solution” category, for the year 2008.

The award ceremony was held as part of the 5 day long celebration of our business unit, CME – Communications Media & Entertainment. All 7 DCs(development centres) of Infosys in India and the DC in UK, were connected via video-conferencing during the inaugural ceremony and the award distribution.

During the award distribution, everyone in the team, was called up on the stage and given the certificate of appreciation by the chief guest at the respective DCs.

In Bangalore DC, the chief guest was the CEO and co-founder of Infosys Technologies Ltd., Kris Gopalakrishnan.

I would be lying if I say that, receiving the award from Kris during the function was a dream come true for me, because I had never even dreamt of anything like this, not even in my wildest dreams.

Before you folks conclude me as a self-praiser, let me tell you that it wasn’t anything exceptional in me that landed me up there, sharing the stage with Kris. It was an award won by my previous project team, and I was lucky to be a part of that wonderful team, which had some of the most talented folks in Infosys.

During my interview for Infosys a few years ago, I was asked to define a team-player in just one sentence. It would have been a tricky question for me hadn’t I been the part of our placement cell in college. Working for the placement made me realise that, a true team-player is one who puts the team before himself or herself.

After joining Infosys, this realization has only got stronger every time. I must say that, in all the 5 projects that I got to work in Infosys till date, I have got to work with some great team-players, who on various occasions have put their personal things aside for the sake of the team.

CSPSPORT, was one such great team which was honoured on Friday.

Starting from the Delivery Manager to Software Engineers like me, everyone had at one point or other had to compromise on personal front, just to ensure that we deliver the best as a team. Whether it was skipping one time’s meal, staying late in office or getting the leave cancelled to meet the challenging deadlines, everyone in the team pitched in, irrespective of their ranks.

During the deployment of one of the releases of our solution, my Project Manager - Anil and one of the Technical Architects - Karthik, had to stay late in office on a Friday night. They worked till 4am on Saturday morning, went back home at 6am, and came back to work at 9am.

Some may argue that, staying late with work is not a good thing and shows lower productivity. I too agree upon that, it is not just about working hard, but also about working hard. But then, there do come situations wherein there is no other way, but to stay late and complete the work. It is during such situations where a person’s team player ability is put to test. Does he/she agree to put in that extra effort for the sake of the team, or turns his/her back saying that it is not possible as it was not expected to be done/planned for earlier.

Looking back at all those scratching of head, hitting the keys in the keyboard hard out of frustration, skipping breakfast/lunch, cancelling plans for dinner with collegemates/roomies, coming to office on weekends, missing friends engagements/weddings, cancelling trips to Cochin; getting the team award is indeed satisfying.

But then, there are thousands out there who go through all that, or probably much more than that, not just in Infosys or in the IT industry, without getting recognized or appreciated. Considering this, I must say that I am indeed very lucky, to have got an opportunity to receive an award from a person of the stature of Kris Gopalakrishnan.

I was kind of skeptical about writing this post, as some may feel that I am trying to boast a bit about myself, with this. But then, I would have done injustice to my blog if I didn't write about one of the most cherishable moments of my life, in here.

A moment that is nothing but, God's gift to me.

PS: I dedicate this post to Archana & Chikita, my Senior Project Manager and Module Lead in CSPSPORT, who I wish could have been there with us when the team received the award.

-AV

Somebody called, 'God'

2008-09-10T21:16:00.009+05:30

Situation: It's a Sunday. I have bad cold, with medication having little effect. Now, as part of the Onam celebrations at office, I have to design posters and banner to be used for the publicity campaign and during the cultural show. I go to office and complete designing the posters. I then start working on the banner - 20ft long and 9ft high. Just to give a hang of things- the size of the photoshop file of this banner comes close to 600MB, and it takes close to 6-7minutes to save any change, on a machine with 2GB RAM.

Though I have done a little bit of designing before, this is the first time I am doing something of this big a scale. I realize that I can't do it alone, hence I call up my collegemate, Suja, to help me out. She agrees. I give her the file I worked on along with some images that I had collected, and give her an idea as to how the banner should look.

I come back to my home to collect some more images from internet, which could be used for the banner. I specifically search for, "Vilak" - traditional indian lamp used in temples and at homes. After close to 20minutes of searching, I get nothing. I give up Googling. I badly want that image, which probably would make the banner look even better. I get restless. The perfectionist(not about everything) within me hates this sort of incompleteness.

Do I get it?

Well, it's sort of a story in itself. If you have time, read on.

While scratching my head in frustration, one thing strikes me - my sister's wedding photos will help!!

But before the relief could settle in, I realise that I had left the DVD of the wedding photos at office, that too at my ex-projectmate's drawer. I was not sure whether he had locked it while going home on Friday evening. Moreover the thought of travelling back to office for the second time in the day, on a rainy Sunday evening through the usual traffic snarls of Bangalore, dampned the spirits.

Though I had one of those images uploaded in my blog, it somehow didn't suffice the high resolution requirement of the banner design. I somehow had to get my hands on the high resloution version of that image, which came close to 6MB.

I gave a call to Dad.

Me: Hi Dad, I need one help from you.

Dad: Shoot son.

Me: Can you mail me one of the snaps from Chechi's wedding DVD?

Dad: You want it now?

Me: Yeah.

Dad: Well, we have come out for shopping now. Do you want us to go back home now?

Me: No Dad. That's ok, I will ask Chechi.

I then tried giving a call to my beloved sister, thinking that she might have the wedding photos with her, which she could mail me. It kept ringing. As usual she didn't pick up. Grrr...

There was a bleak possibility of the file being there in my machine at office. But, I wasn't sure enough to go to office and get it. Instead I thought of finding out whether anyone whom I knew was in office at that time. Luckily one of my batchmates was there at office preparing for his certification. I asked him whether he could help me out. He agreed. I asked him to log into my machine and search in some specific folders where it could possibly have been there.

Nope, it wasn't there too.

I was running out of options.

I finally called up my ex-projectmate, Vineeth, whose drawer had the DVD with the file that I was desperately looking for.

Me: Dude, I need one help from you.

Vineeth: What happened?

Me: Did you lock your drawer when you left office on Friday?

Vineeth: I think so, why? what happened?

Me: I wanted that DVD, that I had kept at your drawer a couple of weeks back.

Vineeth: Is it urgent?

Me: Yeah. Is there any possibility of it being open?

Vineeth: Well, not sure, probably a 80%-20% chance.

Me: 80% chance of it being open?

Vineeth: No, it being closed!

Me: Ok. Thanks anyways.

Vineeth: Are you going to office now for it?

Me: Yeah, I might go, that too for the second time in the day.

Vineeth: Second time?

Me: Yeah, I had gone in the morning to design the posters and banners for the Onam celebration.

Vineeth: Then, why didn't you call me at that time?

Me: Well, it didn't strike me then. My mistake.

Vineeth: Anyways, let me know if I can help you in anyway.

Me: No, it's fine. I will find a way out. Thanks. Bye.

Going to office was the last option. I once again called up my batchmate who was there in office. I explained the situation to him, and asked whether he could go to Vineeth's building, which is 5mins walk away from his building, and just see whether his drawer was locked. He said he was busy preparing for his certification. I don't blame him for his response, but if I had been in his place, I would have preferred a break of 5mins, to walk to a building couple of blocks away, and help my friend. Nevertheless, I thanked him and wished him luck for his certification.

As I sat on the sofa at our home, I wondered what should I do. Should I go to office and find out whether Vineeth's drawer was locked or not? What if it was locked?

I wanted to go against all odds, but the very thought of coming back empty handed was too tough to imagine. Was it worth the try? Well, it seemed worth it. We needed that high resolution image for our banner. We needed it for our Onam celebration. We needed it for us.

I got ready and told Ghosh, my roomie, that I was going to office, again. He had overheard all my conversations on phone, hence I didn't have to explain much to him. Before leaving, I just asked him - "Ghosh, will I get it". His reply was quite simple to it - "Yes dear, you will". Though I knew that idiot replied in affirmative just to keep my heart, I just smiled back at his reply.

I started off in the bike. While on the road I made sure that I stuck to the rightmost lane to avoid traffic policemen. My head felt quite heavy as I drove down the busy Hosur Road. It was horrible at some places, with big pot-holes, and vehicles splashing mud as they drove past.

All through my ride, I kept praying. I wished Vineeth's drawer to be open. I didn't want to go back empty handed.

I reached office. As I walked into Vineeth's building, my heart started thumping, the way it did when I went in for Infosys interview almost 3 years back.

I had come all the way from my place to office, on a rainy Sunday, for the second time in the day, with my head aching like hell. Finding the drawer locked was the last thing I wanted to see happening.

The moment of truth came. I finally reached Vineeth's cubicle. As my hands reached the handle of the drawer, I closed my eyes in prayer.

I pulled the handle.

It was locked. I couldn't believe it, rather I didn't want to believe it. It can't be locked, it just can't be.

But then, the truth was that the drawer was locked with my DVD inside it. Against all odds, I had come this far with high hopes, but it was all in vain. Not sure whether it was due to the sever headache that I was having at that time, but I felt like screaming out loud, to air out my frustration and disappointment.

With a heavy heart I walked away from Vineeth's cubicle. I walked to my building. I thought of logging into my system and again start Googling for "Vilak".

When I logged into my machine, I just felt like searching the file that I had earlier asked my batchmate to search in my machine. I went into all the folders where that file could have been possibly there. No luck. The file wasn't anywhere.

I opened Google and started searching for the images. It was the same set of search results that I had got at home. Damn.

I was really pissed off. I had decided to go back and forget about "Vilak". We will design our banner without it. I closed the browser. As I was about to hit the shutdown button, something striked me. That high resolution image could be in one folder which I didn't search.

A few clicks, and I saw something that filled my eyes. It was that file that I was looking for. The high resolution file which we could use in our banner.

I couldn't believe it. It was all worth it. I finally got what I wanted. The exact feeling that I had at that moment is something that I can't express in words. It probably was one of the happiest moments of my life.

As I got up from my place with moist eyes, just one thought ran through my mind - there indeed is somebody called, 'God'.

PS: Though we had thought of using that particular image in the banner, we eventually used it in one of the posters instead. Nevertheless, it was worth the effort. This year's Onam Celebrations at Infosys Bangalore, organized by us was a Gala event, which everyone enjoyed.

This is the poster with the image of the traditional lamp - 'Vilak'.

This is the banner designed by us in which we had initially thought of having the image of the traditional lamp -'Vilak'.

-AV

My last days in Infosys

2008-08-22T23:58:00.014+05:30

Disclaimer: All names have been changed in this post, for resaons that you would get to know by the end.

It’s with a heavy heart that I say - 'I am living my last days in Infosys'. My stint at Infy seems to be coming to a tragic end. It had been an eventful journey of 2 long years. A journey full of memories and moments to cherish.

After getting into my new project a month back, I have been going for lunch with my collegemates in Infy on a regular basis. It probably is the best time in the day, when all of us sit across the table and discuss about almost everything under the Sun.

As we sat for today’s lunch, I had no clue that I would be in for a surprise, or rather a shocker.

Sujatha: "Hey, why didn’t you send me that mail yesterday?"

Me: "Which mail?"

Sujatha: "The one that you were talking about during lunch yesterday?"

Me: "Oh that one…well, I had mailed it to you and Nikhil. You didn’t get it?"

Sujatha: "No."

Me: "Nikhil, what about you? You also didn’t get it?"

Nikhil: "I got it."

Me: "See…then how come you didn’t get it?"

Sujatha: "How do I know. You would have sent it to someone else…"

I could hear bells ringing inside my head.

“Oh No…I…I think…I…Shuckssssss …..”

It goes without saying that I had made a fool out of myself, once again. Before going further, let’s rewind to what transpired yesterday during lunch.

“Guys, do you know one thing. We are going to have a Bhabhi”. That’s a line that doesn’t take much time to pull the attention of folks around.

“Who Abhi…who…??”

Aaann…aaa…no real names in blog, it’s a matter of my existence. Let’s call our hero ‘Rahul’ and Bhabhiji ‘Anjali’.

Me: “Well, you wouldn’t believe it...it’s Rahul”

Sujatha: “What? Our Rahul?”

Me: “Yeah”

Sujatha: “Rahul, is that true?”

Me: “See..see…the way he is blushing…”

The smile on Rahul’s face reminded me of the smile that my sister had when she first saw Jeeju.

Sujatha: “How is she Rahul?”

You don’t expect the bride-to-be to do anything apart from just smile, when the bridegroom-to-be and his family surround her. Rahul kept smiling.

Me: “Well, she seems to be pretty. I have got her photo, not very clear though.”

Sujatha: “Send it to me…”

Me: “With pleasure…by the way Rahul, you don’t mind right?”

Only fools commit the same mistake second time in less than a few seconds. How do you expect the bride-to-be to give a straight forward answer? Rahul kept smiling.

Sujatha: “You just send it, let us have a look at our Bhabhi.”

Me: “Yup, that will be the first thing I am gonna do after getting back to my desk.”

As promised, the first thing that I did after reaching my desk was to open Microsoft Outlook 2007. I opened the mail that I had sent to Rahul earlier in the day. It had Anjali's photo in it. In the mail I also punched in the following lines in Malayalam - "Rahule...kanditt aal kollamalloda..." [Translation: Rahul, by her looks Anjali seems to be good]

I then clicked on the ‘Forward’ button. I typed in Sujatha’s & Nikhil’s name. Thanks to auto-complete in Outlook, my job was made easier. I hit the send button with excitment. I had forwarded the mail with Anjali's photo in it to Sujatha & Nikhil.

Some of you may find fault in my sending a girl’s photo to my friends. Well, I somehow didn’t find any issue in sending Anjali’s photo to my friends at Infosys, as I got it from Intranet which everyone in Infy has access to. It wasn’t done with any wrong intention, it was just to have a dig at one of the members in our gang, something that keeps happening among close friends. Still, if you feel that I was wrong at doing it – my apologies for the same.

But, regarding Rahul & Anjali’s love story, the only thing I can say is that – there can’t be smoke without fire. Wish I could open up more on that.

Anyways, coming back to what happened during today's lunch. It was a shocker for me when Sujatha told me that she didn't get the mail from me.

There were just two possibilities, either there was some problem with her mailbox or I had sent the mail to the wrong person, and that was the last thing that I expected to have happened. The reason being - last year I had accidentally added another person with the same name as my collegemate- 'Sujatha', into a chain mail. I didn't realise it untill that lady replied to me pointing out that I had included her email-id by mistake.

Now there is one interesting thing about that lady is that, she is a very senior person in Infosys, with her employee number in the range of 2000-3000, which means she has been in Infy for close to 15 years!!!

To add beer to the fire, she is also a Malayalee.

As soon as I reached my desk, I opened my mailbox and checked my sent items folder.

It couldn’t have got any better. I had done the unthinkable - I had sent a mail with a girl's photo with that one liner in Malayalam - "Rahule...kanditt aal kollamalloda...", to a person in Infosys who would have joined Infy when I was in 3rd or 4th standard.

I was dead meat.

Since, I had sent the mail a day before, sending a mail apologizing would have been like digging the dead body out of the grave.

'What next' is something for which even I don't have an answer. I might be booked under ASHI(Anti Sexual Harassment Initiative) at Infosys, who knows I might also get a pink slip for my noble deed. I am keeping my fingers crossed, living through probably my last days in Infosys! :P

PS: Well, I am not quitting Infy, neither do I think they will chuck me out for this. I was just trying to analyse the worst case scenario. ;)

-AV

Do you have something to say?

2008-08-02T22:30:00.012+05:30

Anjali replied to this post!!!
For those who have already read this post, do scroll down to the end of this post to have a look at Anjali's version. For those who haven't read this post yet, kindly read through the post to know what exactly does the previous line mean. :P

This is something that I wanted to write about long back, but then thought of waiting for the right time to come. Well, it’s time.

It’s about an incident that happened when I was in college, which probably I shouldn’t share with you folks. I have been digging my own grave since some time through my blog, I just hope that a few inches of digging might not make a big difference to it.

So, here it goes...

It was during one of those exam seasons in college that I first noticed this girl. I still remember that day. I was taking photostats at our college library.

I used to buy all the books relevant for each semester, but it were the photostats that used to come handy during the exams. Photostats of notes taken by, well, who else- those studious girls in our class.

Though their notebooks used to be neat, with proper headings and underlining with scale, our notebooks used to be more artistic, with paintings and scribblings - all outcome of attempts at staying awake during those boring and chlorophormic lecture sessions.

Nevertheless, the notes of our girls used to be bible to us during exam seasons.

Well, coming back to the incident...

While I was waiting near the photostat machine, I somehow felt as if somebody was looking at me. I turned my head towards that ‘somebody’. It was a girl from our batch. I had seen her before, but never ‘noticed’ her in the crowd.

The moment I looked at her, she took off her eyes from me. She seemed to be waiting for one of her friends.

A few seconds later, I again felt as if ‘somebody’ was looking at me. I turned my head again in the same direction. Same outcome. She took off her eyes from me.

I finally laid my hands on my photostats. While stucking them in my bag, I just turned towards her. She was still at the same place, waiting for her friend, looking at me. I sort of ignored it and left the library.

The very next day, as I was standing outside our examination hall, mugging up the formulae, I again had this feeling that ‘somebody’ was looking at me from the side.

I turned my head. It was her. She immediately took her eyes down to her notebook.

After the exam, I was on my way to the library to return a book. As luck would have it, I saw her again, this time talking to one of her friends. Her friend saw me and said something to her. She instantly turned back and looked at me.

Man, something was wrong with her.

Did she really have something special for me? What was it? Was it infatuation, crush or something else...?

I didn’t know.

There was one more thing that I didn’t know, her name!

I don’t remember exactly how, but I managed to get her name ‘indirectly’, from one of my classmates who knew her.

Her name - well, I can’t reveal her obvious reasons. Let’s call her ‘Anjali’.

Anjali seemed to be a very calm and quite girl. She would hardly smile. She always used to have this serious look on her face.

I don’t know from when, but I also started ‘noticing’ her in the crowd. It was quite strange, but my eyes always used to zero-in on her, in the crowd.

Encounters with Anjali used to be quite funny. I would see her coming with her friend. She would look at me from a distance. I would look at her. Just an instant glance. We both would then sway our eyes in different directions, quite unpretentiously. Then, as both of us neared each other from opposite ends, we again would have an instant glance at each other, at the same time.

Oops!!

Thought it was never close to anything like love, it was a pleasant feeling. One which most of you would have experienced in life.

Ironically, I never tried to know more about her, forget about taking the first step towards her.

Months passed by, with those pleasant encounters happening on and off.

One fine day, I got to know that she belonged to a different religion. Knowing my parents, I knew that bringing a girl from a different religion wouldn’t be a problem at my home. They would accept her whole heartedly. Still, having seen problems associated with such things in the life of a few people, I have been little averse at it.

Thankfully, I wasn’t too serious about Anjali. Hence, it was now easier for me to reply, if ever Anjali came to me and said – ‘I have something special for you’.

I started ignoring Anjali. During our encounters thereafter, I made it a point that I would not look at her, no matter what happened. I expected her to realize over a period of time that, I didn’t have anything for her.

Unfortunately, I felt she was not getting the message across. She was not understanding what I wanted her to. She was still ‘noticing’ me.

A sort of guilty feeling started setting into me. Through the glances during our earlier encounters, I was responsible for making her feel that I had something for her. I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have given her any hope.

Finally, I decided to talk to her and clear off things. I didn’t have to wait for long.

I saw her near one of the staff rooms. I had gone there to collect one of my answer sheets. Not many were there. I saw her looking at me.

This was the right opportunity. The perfect chance to tell her that I didn’t have anything for her in my heart.

I didn’t think twice and went straight to her.

Me: Hi

Anjali: Hi

Me: Do you have anything to say?

Anjali: Me? No. Why?

The reply from her was so cold that, it felt like a tight slap on my face. Now, this wasn’t expected from a girl who laid her eyes on me months back. This was not part of the script. I mean...how could she react that way?

Me: Nothing

That was the best thing that could come out from my mouth. I looked left. I looked right. No one apart from me and her had heard anything. I started walking back to my class.

I tried to get back to my senses after that jolt. It was now time for disaster recovery and brainstorming.

Well, there was no doubt that she had been ‘noticing’ me since last several months. But why the hell did she react that way?

After lot of thinking, there were just two possibilities:-
1. She indeed had some feeling for me, but was shy to admit.
2. She didn’t have any feeling for me, instead she thought that I was the one to start the ‘noticing’ game.

The first reason seemed to be fine. But then if it was the second reason then, I had made a fool out of myself.

Anyways, I continued ignoring her. I had thought of finding out the reason from her on our farewell day, a day when usually such things come out.

Years passed by. Our farewell came, but by then I had dropped the option of talking to Anjali and finding out the reason.

The funny part was that, none of my collegemates had an idea that something of this sort had happened in my life. I hadn’t shared this with anyone in my college. That actually saved me from a lot of humiliation.

A few months back, Anjali sent me a friend’s request in Orkut!!

During our chats, neither of us touched up on the incident that happened near the staff room. But then, I wanted to know which among the two was the reason, for her cold reply that day.

After a lot of hiccups I managed to start a conversation on this. I asked her the reason. She gave a reply, one for which I had waited almost 4 years.

Yes, I had made a fool out of myself, an A1 quality fool.

She used to ‘notice’ me, thinking that I started it all and that I had some special feelings for her.

Anyways, I am gonna meet Anjali tomorrow!

Yeah, I am gonna meet her in person for the first time, after I asked her ‘Do you have something to say’, on that fateful day in college.

**********Update**********

Date: August 3rd, 2008.

I met Anjali today. We had a nice time, and yes, we indeed had a conversation about all that had happenned in college. We concluded that it was her 'absent-mindedness', that was the culprit behind everything. She claims that she doesn't remember noticing me in the library and during the initial encounters.

*********************************

**********Anjali's Reply**********
Date: August 9th, 2008.

Folks, following is Anjali's reply to my post, which she mailed me earlier this week. As per her request, I am including this within my post, instead of putting it in the comments section.

First of all, lemme explain why I don’t want to post a comment like other readers. “The heroin” deserves a place near to “The hero” and not among the audience. :)

Here is Anjali’s version of that “Love Story” …

I started noticing this guy a few weeks before he came and asked me if “I have something to say”..

I saw this guy ‘noticing me in the crowd” one day.. well, I don’t remember the exact day or any other related incidents because this incident never went inside my heart. But the “intension” of this guy was quite visible in his eyes and I started noticing that this guy has something for me.

After that I started looking at this guy just to know if he is noticing me. This happened 2-3 times and after that he came and asked me those “Golden words” which is already written in the history of his ‘mirage love life’. :P

I was thinking why he asked me such a stupid question. Because that question really didn’t make any sense. Also the expression on his face (the very feeling of a tight slap on his face) was quite weird.

After that I stopped noticing this guy thinking that something has happened to him and he asked the question to the wrong person.

After 2-3 years of that incident, one day I was doing my regular orkut safari and found this guy in somebody’s friend’s list. Only because I know this guy(not in person but by face) I sent a friends request. I didn’t even know where he is now , his company or anything.

He accepted me in orkut and sent me the scrap. He scrapped me looked like as if he has been in touch with me for many years and we are very good friends. I really got surprised because I thought he wouldn’t even recognize me.

There started the beginning of a very good friendship. We never spoke much (apart from the above mentioned conversation) in college, we don’t know much about the personnel details or anything. But two good friends were born and their friendship started blooming.

Yes .. we met on Aug 3rd and we both didn’t have any problems of not knowing much about each other. Yes, some friendships are meant for special friends like us and indeed you are a very special friend for me. I have lots of friends and I always choose friends after knowing them very well only. But in this case I am sure that my decision is correct. Even if other friends go away from me this guy won’t. We are “The Friends for Ever” !!!!

ok.. coming to the story part… we talked about all those incidents and finally we found the culprit. “My absent mindedness!!!!”

From the bottom of my heart I am telling you … “ nothing was intentional” from my side..

But lemme ask you a genuine question. Just because one gal looked at you 3-4 times with/without intensions ,why you started making up things and started thinking till the extend of whether your parents will accept her or not??? (I can imagine him slapping me!!!)

So my absent mindedness is just 1% of the reason and the real culprit is your over confidence Mr. Abhinav. :)

Am I right my dear friends?? :P

****************************************

-AV

What's the value of a human life?

2008-07-27T11:46:00.014+05:30

What’s the value of a human life?

“Freedom”

Well, fair enough.

Till this day, world has been witness to numerous struggles and battles waged in the name of freedom. Millions laid down their lives and took others, for the very basic right of an individual, i.e., to live freely.

India, as a nation, has had its tryst with the struggle for freedom. I am not sure about the coming generations, but most of us would have read about all that in our history books and seen all that in the form of movies and documentaries.

It indeed is a moving realisation that, there was a world before we stepped in, where one couldn’t speak openly, walk freely. A world of near slavery. A world of oppression. A world of indignity.

We all should appreciate the fact that we didnt take birth in such a world.

We live in a world which offers freedom of speech and expression. We live in a world where we can do things which people wouldn’t have even dreamt of, pre-independance.

In fact, the only time when we realize that we are blessed with something called “freedom”, is on days like 15th August or 26th January. It’s another thing that some among us fail to appreciate the importance of these days which, to be frank, are the only days when we as a Nation look back at the sacrifices made by our forefathers, who wished to see us- their future generations, live in a free world devoid of slavery, oppression and indignity.

Today, as we march ahead towards tomorrow, there are a set of people, who think that they are yet to attain freedom, in their own words – Jihad.

I still remember myself reading news during the morning assemblies in my school, and as far as I recollect, most of the times, I would find something related to this new form of freedom struggle, to read out to the crowd.

Being the son of a person, who served in the defense for sometime, and having done all of my schooling in various schools(KVs) located close to defense installations, such things somehow evoke a lot of frustration within me.

I had just come out from a meeting in office on Friday afternoon, when my colleague told me that there have been serial bomb blasts in Bangalore.

The previous night, I had been less than a hundred yards away from the exact spot where one of the bombs went off at Madiwala, killing a lady and injuring a few others. I had gone there to see off one of my friend’s mother who was going back to Cochin in bus. Instead of taking an auto back home to Kormangala 8th Block, I opted to walk. I had no clue that on my way back, I had come close to as much as 2-3 meters from 2 of the bombs, which were timed to go off after a few hours.

Thankfully the Bangalore bomb blasts were all of low intensity, though Sudha, the lady at Madiwala lost her life and a few others got injured.

But what came as a shocker was the news of serial bomb blasts rocking Ahmedabad, the very next day. 17 of them, killing 45 and injuring over 100.

45 human lives.

For what?

Well as per one of the organisation which claimed the responsibilty for the blasts, they were carried out - “In the light of the injustice and wrongs on a specific section of the society in the state in 2002”.

Ok. I have a few questions for the folks responsible:-

Among the 45, how many carried out the atrocities in 2002?

Among the 45, how many stood in path of your so called “Jihad”?

Among the 45, how many were Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Sikhs...?

Among the 45, how many were directly responsible for what happened in 2002?

I would appreciate if you folks could get us the answers for these questions.

It would have been a slightly different case, had you taken down specific people who were directly responsible for the 2002 atrocities, people who pulled the strings from above.

Till date there hasn’t been any bomb designed, which would explode in a customised way, killing only people of a specific religion, caste or race, in a heterogenous crowd. Probably the day someone finds it, do get your hands on it.

We Indians, feel sorry for all that happened not just in 2002 but in every single instance in the history of our nation till now, where innocent people have lost their lives, for no fault of theirs.

Among the 45 who lost their lives, there has been:-

A mother who had a child waiting at home.

A daughter who was on her way back from school.

A father who was the sole breadowner for the family.

A son who had gone out to get some vegetables for dinner.

All innocent people, with their dreams and aspirations for tomorrow.

Was it all worth it?

Whatever you have done, has it helped your people or your cause in any way?

Just take a moment and think, how would have your mother felt on giving birth to you, had she known at that moment that you would end up doing all this in the future. Would she be still happy at bringing such a new life into this world?

People like me can only hope that, someday you realize the fact that, what you are doing is not right. It’s not helping anyone. No matter in whose name, no one has the right to take an innocent life.

And yes, one more thing. Irrespective to what you guys have done and plan to do in the future, India as a Nation is not going to kneel in front of you. Decades of struggle has brought India to where it is today, and we as citizens of this Nation will not let such senseless acts of yours, dither us from our spirits.

Hope you guys someday realize the value of a human life.

PS: I know whatever I have written here, might not make a difference to people who were behind the Bangalore & Ahmedabad blasts. Still, I wrote this as I couldn't find a better way to air out my frustration over such fanatics.

-AV

What a jerk.

2008-07-11T02:32:00.008+05:30

It has been some time since I have been posting about funny things that happen with me and my roommates. Some folks asked me whether all that was true or they were just deliberate attempts to make some funny posts from imagination.

Well, I warn those folks that I will not stand any such baseless allegations against me, and they better be prepared to get themselves sued in the court, before they even think of repeating it again.

Grrr...

Well, continuing with the saga of stupidities, fun and laughter, let me take you through something funny that happened a few days back, to be precise on Tuesday.

On days that I manage to leave by the 615pm bus from office, I usually have early dinner with two of my roomies - Binu & Ghosh, and couple of other friends at A2B - Adayar Anand Bhavan. We have a gala time over delicious dosas and hot tea, discussing about almost everything under the sun, from goals in life to girls in life.

After dinner, Binu, Ghosh and I drive back home in a bike.

3 of us in one bike, bole tho Swades ishtyle, with the M80 in the movie replaced by Binu's bike. Yes, he is the same person who got Licensed To Kill. :P

Last week while going triples on bike, we narrowly escaped from being caught by Bloated-Belly-Uncles :- The Traffic Policemen. Since then Ghosh & I walk till the main road ends, where Binu waits for us, and from there we go on for the threesome ride.

Things were the same this Tuesday also, until "I want to go to the ATM", came from Ghosh's mouth. That's when the chain of events started.

We were midway from A2B and the place where Binu would wait for us. The ATM was at a distance on the other side of the road.

As soon as Ghosh told that he wanted to withdraw money from the ATM, we decided to cross the road. While squeezing ourselves through the available gaps, my eyes fell on two pretty girls walking exactly on the other side of the road, in the direction of our ATM. Had we continued crossing the road at the same pace, we would have found ourselves walking ahead of them after crossing the road.

I applied my brakes on Ghosh with my hands on his shoulder.

Me: Hey, slow down.

Ghosh: Why? What happened?

"Hoyy...", that irritatingly cliche howl of a Bangalore autodriver blew past my ear-drums.

Me: Can't you see those girls.

Ghosh: So?

Me: Haven't you been taught "Ladies First"? :P

Ghosh: So?

Me: Let them go before us.

Ghosh: What's wrong with you man?

Ghosh hit the accelerator again, making me apply the brakes again, with more force. By the time we crossed the road the girls were right ahead of us. Before I could say something, Ghosh again started walking fast.

"What's wrong dude? Do you have a train to catch?", I whispered into Ghosh's ears. But before I could apply the brakes again, he let himself loose from my hands on is shoulder.

He overtook the girls, got 3-4 steps infront of them, turned back and gave me, a shocker.

He SHOUTED on full throttle - "Eda Abhi vegam nadakkada". [Translation: Abhi, walk fast.]

The girls found themselves caught off guard with a guy shouting at them. I looked at the five point something figure walking in front of them. Ghosh had made a hell of an idiot out of himself, by shouting at me, with the girls sandwiched in between.

"Ladies, please don't turn back", a prayer shot out instantly from my heart. Had they turned back, they would have realized that Ghosh was shouting at me. Thanks to my stars, they didn't turn back.

"What a jerk".

These 3 words from one of the girls, had myself under tremendous pressure, trying hard to stop myself from bursting into laughter.

Poor soul. He tried to have a dig at me, but unfortunately ended up digging his own grave.

Meanwhile the girls were walking pretty slowly and I had to overtake them. While overtaking I just hoped that Ghosh doesn't turn back and smile at me, as I wanted myself to be kept out of all that the pretty ladies had witnessed. For a few seconds I wanted to disassociate myself from that five point something insane, who shouted at those girls on the streets.

I looked straight. Ghosh had reached the ATM counter, looking into our direction, a few yards ahead of me. I immediately took out my mobile and dialed my own number. Well, it was not by mistake. It was intentional. I wanted to ignore Ghosh, and it seemed to be the easiest way out.

I walked past the ATM, I could sense Ghosh's head turning towards my direction as I crossed him. I somehow got a feeling that he was laughing at me, thinking that he had made me an idiot in front of the two girls.

I went a few steps ahead and stood there, acting as if I was talking to someone on mobile. In a few seconds the girls crossed me and took a diversion to a lane on the right. I waited for some more time, to make sure that they were far enough.

I then turned back and burst into a loud laughter. The security guy at the ATM was shaken up from his sleep.

Me: 'What a jerk'...bu hu ha ha ha ha ha....

Ghosh: What?

Me: They called you a jerk.

Ghosh: Who.

Me: Those girls.

Ghosh: Me?

Me: Yeah you, they thought you are like those insane guys who shout at people on the streets.

Ghosh: Come, lets go. Binu would be waiting for us.

I could understand how exactly was Ghosh feeling at that moment. The same way I was feeling last week when I sent that message to Anjali.

Ghosh, I can understand your plight. I have just one thing to tell you - "What a jerk". :P

-AV

Gudnite Sweetheart !!!

2008-07-02T22:10:00.009+05:30

Disclaimer: Some names have been changed in this post due to some serious privacy issues. :P

Last Sunday was a special day for my friend Rahul, as it was his 'special' friend Anjali's birthday, for whom he seems to have something 'special' in his heart. I guess, I limit myself to this, else my parents might have to see me with a couple of bruises on my face when I go home to Cochin this weekend.

I had just come home after seeing off my collegemate who had come to Bangalore over the weekend. As I entered our room, I saw my dear friend's prized possession - his mobile. Ever since this special friend popped into our lives, his mobile has remained out of our bounds. And, in case we really needed it, he would do a complete cleanup before handing it over to us.

Rahul was in Ghosh's room. This was the best opportunity for me to lay my hands on his mobile and play some prank on him. I hadn't thought of anything in particular, I just wanted to do something cranky. I went straight to his Inbox, there was one message from her - "Thanks a lot for the birthday wishes..."

What do I do? Should I send her some message?

Yeah...but what should I write?

"Gudnite Dear"...naah...

"Gudnite Sweetheart"....

Naah...

A face with bruises won't look good. Quits.

Wait...I will forward her number to my mobile, so that I can use it in future. What an idea Sirjee!!

Gosh, how many times do I need to prove that I am a genius?

Anyways, without wasting a second I forwarded her number to mine and kept the mobile phone safely back under his pillow.

I then went straight to Ghosh's room where he and Rahul were doing something on the laptop. From the smile on my face they could make it that I was up to something.

Ghosh: What happened? Why are you smiling like that?

Rahul: Forget it Ghosh, it's his usual idiotic laughing-for-nothing act.

Me: Thanks a lot for the birthday wishes.

Ghosh: What?

Me: Somebody just got a message.

Rahul: Who? What?

Me: Nothing I just did you some help, Rahul. I sent a reply to your sweetheart.

Rahul: Sweetheart? Who? Anjali.

Me: Yej...Eggjactly...

Rahul was at his feet in an instance.

Ghosh: Cool man...what did you write?

Me: Well, nothing much, just a 'Gudnite Sweetheart'.

Gleeeeeeeee.... :P

Rahul: You idiot, did you really do that? If yes, then today would be the last day of your life.

Me: Yes, I indeed did that. But, I have deleted it from the sent items...

Before I could finish, Rahul ran out of the room to get his mobile. Ghosh and I were laughing at this sight. I told Ghosh that I was just fooling Rahul and that I didn't send any message to Anjali.

Rahul came in with his mobile.

Me: Didn't your heart just skip a beat now?

Rahul: You have any idea what did you do Dude?

Me: Yeah...I just forwarded her number to my mobile, so that we can use it in the future.

Rahul: Are you out of your mind?

Me: Why? What happened?

Rahul: Duffer, you forwarded your mobile number to her. The other way round.

Me: What what??

Rahul: Check your mobile, have you got any message from my number?

Me: No.

Rahul: That's what. You sent your number to her from my mobile, instead of sending her number to yours.

Me: Shucks...

Ghosh outburst into a loud laughter.

Me: Shucks man...but...I...how...shucks...

Rahul: That's not all. There is more to it.

Me: What do you mean?

Rahul: You sent it to Anjali right?

Me: Yeah.

Rahul: You know what's our house owner's name?

Me: Hmm...some "appa"...

Rahul: Golgappa. Dude, our aunty's name is also Anjali.

Me: So?....oh no....don't tell me that it was her number...

Rahul: Yes it was. You sent your number to our house owner, that too at this time of the night.

Me: *()&*%^&$%^#^%&^&^

I went blank for a few seconds, thinking what exactly I had done.

Ghosh was on the verge of falling off from his bed, unable to control his laugh.

Rahul: Has anyone told you how big an idiot you are?

Ghosh: [gasping for breath] No....no one has to tell him...he just proves it again and again.

Me: You thankless jerks, I just saved all of us from being kicked out from the house. Show some courtesy.

This attempt to regain some lost self esteem, was an utter flop. I literally had to get out from the house for a few moments to spare my ears from listening to all that my beloved roommates had to say.

I thanked my stars for not making me send the "Gudnite Sweetheart" message to Anjali.

-AV

Does this Nation belong to you?

2008-06-17T21:23:00.017+05:30

I look outside the window, towards the clear blue sky, waiting for our bus to take off from the Infosys bus terminal. I see a guy walking towards the bus adjacent to ours. He has a plastic cover of snacks in his hands. He rushes to finish it off before getting into the bus. Just before stepping into the bus, he throws the plastic cover near the front wheel of the bus, in a very unassuming way. He coolly gets into the bus as if nothing happened.

The sight really irritated me. I wanted to call him up and ask him to pick up that plastic cover. But with people around me in the bus, that seemed to be a bad option. The next best thing that struck me was to get down from our bus, go and pick up the plastic cover and drop it in the waste bin that was kept at a distance. But again, the fear of losing my window seat held me back.

There I was, looking outside the window with frustration, at the plastic cover lying near the front wheel of the adjacent bus, wondering as to how the hell could that guy do a thing like that.

Wasn't he aware of the dustbins kept at the Infy bus stop?

Wasn't he ever reminded at Infosys about his responsibility not just as a citizen of this Nation, but also as a habitant of this planet, on waste disposal/management?

Wasn't he ever taught about a person's responsibility towards his/her surroundings?

Wasn't he ever taught that the place to throw waste is 'waste bins'?

The only answer that came to mind to these questions was - “Yes, he was.”

Then what was the problem?

Well, it's little complicated. Just imagine yourself at your home. A few of your friends pay you a visit. You have a gala time with them. By the time they leave your place, they litter your place, all amidst the fun.

What do you do?

You clean up. Isn't it?

Why?

Because it's 'your' home.

The same would be the case with the guy in question. Even he would clean up the mess left by his friends at his home, because it's 'his' home.

So, he would keep his home clean.

Now, what went wrong with him at the bus stop today? Even being literate and an employee of a company like Infosys, why did he commit an act like that?

Simple and straight answer – because he didn't see Infosys as 'his'. He didn't have sense of belonging towards Infosys. Had it been the case, he wouldn't have done that.

Will he do the same outside Infosys campus in Bangalore?

Yes, he will.

Why?

Because he doesn't see Bangalore as 'his'.

Will he do the same outside Bangalore in any other city within India?

Yes, he will.

Why?

Because he doesn't see India as 'his'.

Will he do the same outside India, when on a official foreign tour?

No, he won't.

Why?

Is it because he finds that country to be 'his'?

No, it's because he fears of being fined for the same.

So, what does one conclude?

a. He does it in India, but not in US, because of the fear of being fined?
b. Because he doesn't see India as 'his'?

Though the first option might seem to be more reasonable, I personally would attribute his actions to the second option.

He did it, because he ceased to acknowledge his responsibility towards this Nation.

He did it, because he ceased to dream of making this Nation a better place to live.

He did it, because he ceased to consider this Nation as his.

I do understand the fact that, the problem to a great extent lies with the Government, which in many cases has not been successful in ensuring that proper systems are in place, so that people don't litter around. Just to quote an example is the absence of dustbins in trains.

A few weeks back, I was forced to throw a plastic plate into the darkness while traveling in a train to Cochin. Somehow, on that day, I forgot to take an extra plastic bag that I usually carry along with me while traveling in train so that I don't end up dropping waste outside. As I write this post, I feel ashamed of myself for that. I guess there is a long way for me to go, before I can confidently call myself a responsible citizen of this Nation.

Though we might not find a dustbin/suitable place to throw the waste, most of the times, just a little extra effort on our part can ensure that we end up putting the waste at the right place. This Nation belongs to us, and as its citizen it's our responsibility to make sure that we keep it clean. We have a bigger role to play here, than the Government.

Let's make it a better place to live, for us and our coming generations.

Let's try to realize that this "Nation belongs to us", the way our home belongs to us.

Just hope that, the guy who disappointed me today, realizes this someday.

My friend got a second life.

2008-06-06T22:28:00.005+05:30

This Monday, I and my roommate – Ghosh, were returning home. As we started hopping up the stairs of our apartment, we heard a voice coming from darkness, not knowing what was in store for us….

"Hello"

"Hello"

Me: Heyn...Ghosh…who is calling us??

Ghosh: I don't know...

"Hello"

Ghosh: Who is it?

I turned back and looked down the stairs. From the darkness emerged, two and a half figures.

Our house owner, her husband and their kid.

Well, don't mistake me for a feminist, I vow for equality, not inequality. Hope the dress code policy "implementers", who give the guys in Infy the liberty to enjoy seeing their female counterparts come in jeans & t-shirts, are listening.

Our house owner happens to be a She rather than a He. Hope you guys got the picture. :P

Me: Hi Uncle, how are you?

Uncle: You guys left the tap open...haan?

Me: What?

Aunty: We lost 2000ltrs of water because of you guys.

In the background, I could hear the footsteps of Ghosh sprinting to second floor...that idiot left me, alone infront of the two and a half devils.

Aunty: Because of you guys, I couldn't cook anything today. We had to get food from outside.

Me: But Aunty, we had closed all the taps before going to office today morning.

Aunty: Then, where did all the water vanish? We checked the taps on the first floor, those guys didn't leave any tap open.

Me: Are you sure it was us?

Aunty: Then what? You guys haven't given us the key of the room unlike the guys at the first floor. Neither did I have your mobile numbers.

Me: But...

Aunty: You are all grown-ups...how can you be so irresponsible?

I was in a very itchy situation. The only name ringing in my mind was - "Tony". That duffer, who would bag the 'Nobel prize for carelessness', the very first years it's introduced , was the one who left last today morning. It had to be him.

Didn't know how, but I wanted to make him pay for all that I had to hear. Even a couple of girls from an adjacent building came out, on hearing somebody getting bashed. Tony had to be dead meat that night.

Me: Aunty, we will pay for the tanker, to fill in water.

Aunty: Will that make up for the inconvenience that you guys caused us today?

Me: Aunty...

Aunty: You guys are so lazy, the other day my Son had come to your room to hand over the electricity bill. On coming back, he told how untidy your room was.

I looked at that half figure standing beside her. His face was lit with a smile. Grrrrr...

Me: ....

Aunty: Give us a duplicate key of your room and also all your mobile numbers.

Me: Sure...Sorry for what happened today. We will pay for the extra water.

Aunty: We probably just have a few hundred litres of water in the underground tank, and we can pump it up only after you guys turn your taps off.

About turn. Left Right Left Right Left Right... She left, followed by that peanut-headed 3-foot idiot.

Uncle: Be more careful in the future.

Me: We will be Uncle.

I gave him the key that I had with me and our numbers.

While hopping the stairs to second floor, one picture was flashing in my mind. Tony. Dead meat.

As I entered our room, I saw Ghosh.

Ghosh: Hi Hi Hi...

Me: What the hell are you laughing at?

Ghosh: Sorry buddy...but the only thing that came into my mind, when they started their bashing was to, run. I was about to give you a call, as if it was your PM, so that you could also escape, saying - "Oh I am sorry...my Manager is calling".

Me: That idiot left last, right?

Ghosh: Hey, I checked all the taps. None was open.

Me:What...are you sure?

Ghosh: Yeah, I am damn sure. The only way it would have leaked would be due to some leak.

Me: Lemme go back to the House Owner and ask him to pump water to the tank. We will see whether there is any leak.

Before I rush down, I hear the motor being switched on. I get back to our room to see whether water is leaking from anywhere. We wait for a few minutes. No leaks.

With a point to prove, I go to them and tell them that none of our taps were open, and none of the pipes were leaking. Not believing our version completely, Aunty asks Uncle to go and check.

He comes and checks everything. No leaks.

Uncle: You guys would have turned the taps off.

Me: Why would we do that? We already apologised for it.

Uncle: Let me go back and check again.

He leaves. Frustrated and kind of exhausted, I sit infront of the TV. Thank God, no more IPL matches!! Well, something to cheer about.

After about 10mins, somebody knocks at our door. It's the house owner, I mean house owner's husband.

Uncle: Well...there was a small leak in one of our bathrooms that
we don't use regularly.

Me: You mean, your bathroom?

Uncle: Yes. But we came to know about it only now.

#%()*(&&^%$@#%E$^

Me: Ok.

Uncle: Sorry for everything.

Me: Hey that's fine. No issues.

Uncle: Had food?

Me: Yes.

Uncle: Ok then. Goodnit.

Me: Goodnit, Uncle.

I was about to close the door, that's when, the poor soul walked in. Tony.

Tony: What happened dude?

Me: Nothing, you just got a second life.

-AV

Licensed To Kill.

2008-05-24T19:09:00.020+05:30

Today was a very important day for my roommate. Today was the culmination of a long wait on his part, to join the elite group of people who are legally entitled to hit the roads on their vehicles. He had his driving test today.

A day for which each one of us has waited anxiously in our life. At least I had waited eagerly for it, as I started driving a couple of years before attaining the legal age for driving a vehicle.It’s been close to 5 years since I got it.

I still remember that fateful day. I expected it to be quite challenging. We were supposed to make “8”, in other words - drive the bike through a track laid in the shape of the digit "8". I was all set to go for the kill on my Hero Honda Splendor.

There he was, my driving school instructor, whom we used to call “Aashan”.

Me: Good Morning Aashane!

Aashan: Good Morning. So, all set for the test?

Me: Yeah.

Aashan: Go, take my M80 and take a couple of practice rounds.

Me: Aashane, I have my Splendor.

Aashan: Let it be there, but you need to take the test on M80.

Me: Ok Aashane.

Cool, I need to take the test on a bike, which I had never driven before. That sounded quite challenging.

I went to the guy who was taking his practice rounds on Aashan’s M80. It was an old M80, a bike(if one may call it so) which usually reminded me of the Meenkaaran Uncle(Uncle selling fish) who used to come in his M80, with his unique "Hoi…Hoi…" calls. Calls, which would make housewives and cats, back home in Kerala, come running onto the streets.

Coming back to the test.

Aashan: Just release the clutch slowly, when you are ready to move.

Me: Aashane, what about gear and accelerator?

Aashan: Don’t worry about all that, you just need to release the clutch and steer your way through the Kammbis(Iron Rods), put at the different curves on the track.

What? No changing of gears? No controlling of the accelerator? No controlling of the clutch?

Was it the driving test for guys in diapers? Was I missing something?

Well, yes, I was missing the fact that, in India, you get the driving license not based on how comfortable you are with your vehicle, instead it’s based on your Aashan’s comfort level with the person from RTO(Regional Transport Office), whose signature finds its way into our driving license, and into whose wallet Indian Currency notes find their way from our wallets.

There I was, sitting on my Aashan’s M80, as a dumb, seeing the fine tuned M80 steer its way through the Kammbis.

I cleared the test for the 2-wheeler vehicle, without any glitch.

The 4-wheeler test, thank God, was not like the 2-wheeler one. There were no fine tunings done on the vehicle. It was an M800, I mean Maruti 800. The only things missing were the covers of TataTea, Lux, SurfExcel and Hans, that used to be hoisted on the Kammbis on the tracks, during our driving classes, indicating us when to start rotating the steering wheel in a specific direction while taking turns on the “H” track.

I cleared that test also.

I now was a person certified to drive “2-Wheeler, With Gear” and “Light Motor Vehicle(4 wheeler)”. Yuppieee…

Coming back to my roommate’s driving test. I, the expert driver, accompanied him to the test. It was a wonderful sight out there.

There were uncles and aunties in their 40s or so, who had come to take the test with their kids. In fact there was a family who had come ready for the kill, loaded with eatables and bottles of water, which left one wondering whether they mistook the driving test to be some picnic.

Surprisingly, here people don’t have to ride their vehicles on the “8” or “H” tracks. They just have to ride their vehicles a few hundred yards on a straight road and come back. Probably the sad state of affairs on the roads of Bangalore, leave no sense in testing people’s driving skill based on whether they can steer it through a specific track properly or not.

Instead, just being able to drive a vehicle straight a few hundred yards, would certify you to be a good driver in Bangalore where the traffic moves at snail’s space, and where there is no respect given to the personal spaces of the poor vehicles. Are there any “Vehicle-Rights” activists listening????

Anyways, my roommate cleared the test for the 2-wheeler with ease. It was now his turn to hit the 4-wheeler on the road. He drove off smoothly and came back without making any mistake.

There was a big smile on his face as he came out of the car. I shook hands with him and congratulated him.

Me: Man, you made it look so simple. Great going buddy.

He: Great going, my foot. I didn’t do anything apart from controlling the steering wheel.

Me: What??

He: Yeah, the guy from the driving school was controlling the clutch, break and the accelerator from his seat. Even the gears were being shifted by him.

Well, welcome to India!!

The way things happen back home in Kerala seem to be much better than what I witnessed here today. Probably the way things happen here would be much better than what happens in other parts of the country, where people manage to get driving license without even attending the driving tests.

Next time you take out your vehicle onto the roads in India, watch out!! You might have people around you, who are not only licensed to drive, but also licensed to kill.

God bless you!

-AV

A dream wedding.

2008-05-10T09:37:00.035+05:30

Since time in memory, there has been one girl who has been an integral part of my life. When I say my life is beautiful, the person whom I think of apart from my parents is this girl.

Her name, Susmitha. My sister, whom I fondly call "Moll" (which in English means, Daughter).

As a kid I have fought a lot with her. In fact she had been a person whom I hated the most at times, especially whenever she used to complain about me to Papa & Mummy.

She was very studious. A perfect book worm, who would sit for hours with a book and mug up big big chapters, without missing a comma or a full-stop. I, unlike her, used to tear off pages from my notebooks before the exams, so that I could save myself from mugging up and answering big questions, which Papa would ask on the evening prior to the exam day. Hence, by the end of the year, my 200pages social studies notebook used to be left with just over 100-120pages, and the rest would have already found its place in the trash bin.

Even after all that, I could consistently manage to get either the 2nd or 3rd place in class. But it had no value in front of the 1st place that my Papa’s daughter would secure every year. End result:- the following phrase used to ring my ears for quite some time - "Abhi, learn something from your sister". It used to irritate me a lot at times. I used to feel jealous of her; one may call it sibling rivalry.

But, that was just one side of the coin. Since both Papa & Mummy were working, she used to be the person with whom I spent the major part of my childhood. Being elder to me, she always had been very protective about me. I still remember her coming at my rescue, whenever I used to involve myself in fights at school. I used to take pride in having an elder sister in the same school, who wouldn't withstand any nonsense being done to her brother.

Years have passed by since then, but even today she is a person from whom I gain a lot of strength. Though I say my life is beautiful, there have been low moments in my life which I wish nobody gets to live through. Hadn't it been for the support I got from her, it would have been a lot tougher to live through all that.

She is one person who has understood me like no one else in this world has, a person who knows me inside out.

On May 4th 2008, she stepped into a new phase of her life, with her wedding. It was the best wedding I have ever witnessed in my life, a real treat to eyes. It was a dream wedding for which we had prayed and toiled hard for months, especially Papa.

Thanks to my 2 weeks leave being approved at office, I could take out enough time and do my bit in helping Papa & Mummy in whatever small way possible. The past several months made me realize the amount of effort that goes into making a wedding successful, it's just enormous.

The fact that everything went well without a glitch and nobody had anything to complain about gives a lot of satisfaction to us. It wouldn't have been possible without God's blessings.

What makes us happier is the fact that she got a wonderful person in my brother-in-law, Soorajettan. A very innocent, cheerful and kind hearted person. I am not sure whether it's because of his profession as a doctor or it comes natural to him, but he is very soft spoken with a smile always on his face, which makes you feel so comfortable when he is around you. After their engagement in December last year, they both had enough time to understand and get close to eachother. Today, they indeed make a beautiful couple.

Moll, if you ever happen to read this, I hope you remember the mail that Papa had sent on your last birthday. Though I don't have the copy of that mail with me now, I still remember what he wrote in it -

"26 years ago on this very day, I and your mother were blessed with our first child, a beautiful baby girl at Red Cross Hospital, Laban, Shillong. A girl who brought a lot of happiness and prosperity into our lives."

So true. No matter how much Papa & Mummy ignore saying it straight, being their first child they love you more than me, and that's something which is not going to change in this lifetime.

Your wedding has been their dream, and today they are proud of the fact that they could find you not only a wonderful person in Soorajettan, but also a wonderful family.

We wish you all the best for a new beginning, may God bless you both with lots of happiness and prosperity in life. Though things would be a little different from now on, the warmth that we four share will always remain in our hearts.

After your wedding, we haven't reduced to three, instead, we have grown to five, with the entry of a wonderful person into our lives. We will always be there for you two for anything and everything.

I love you a lot dear. No matter how much I thank you, it won't be enough for all that you have done to me and my life. Thanks a lot for coming into my life and making it, beautiful.

Hope my niece/nephew walk into my life soon, and make it even more beautiful. :P

Tring...Tring...

2008-04-18T23:34:00.019+05:30

A few days back, one of my old schoolmates had called me. It was after a gap of 7 long years that we spoke to each other. During the conversation, we had a nice time laughing over a long forgotten incident in my friend's life. An incident, which would send shivers through one's spine.

Here it goes..

[Disclaimer: Names of the characters have been changed due to privacy issues.]

Tring...Tring...Tring...Tring...

Anjali: Hello, can I speak to Rahul?

Rahul's Mom: May I know who is calling?

Anjali: Aunty, this is Anjali, Rahul's classmate.

Rahul's Mom: Hold on Anjali, I will call him.

"Rahul, there is a call for you."
"Ya Mom, I am coming."

Rahul: Hello.

Anjali: Idiot, where the hell were you?

Rahul: Oh hi Anjali., how are you doing?

Anjali: Can't you pick up the call before your mother does?

Rahul: So, could you finish the third chapter?

Ajali: Third chapter, my foot. You tell me the time to call and when I call at that exact time, you don't pick up.

Rahul: Oh ok. Even I couldn't finish the third chapter, it's too lengthy.

Anjali: Will you stop talking about chapters, I am already pissed off with all that. I called you, just to take a break from all that.

Rahul: Yes, I know, third chapter is the toughest.

Anjali: One more time you utter the word chapter, tomorrow my chappal would meet you before me.

Rahul: That is bad...

Anjali: Oh...really? Then do something.

Rahul: Well, even I don't know how to solve that problem.

Anjali: Which problem? What's wrong with you duffer?

"Mom, can you get me a glass of water?"
"Hmm..."

Anjali: Finally...you could use your head.

Rahul: Anjali, Mom was in the room. Why can't you understand things?

Anjali: What is there to understand. You are completely hopeless. I call you at a time specified by you, so that we can talk peacefully, without people being around you. But, instead of picking up the call, you make your mother pick up.

Rahul: I was attending another call, Anjali...nature's call!!

Anjali: Don't try to be funny. I am not in a mood to laugh at your PJs. By the way, why is she not in front of the TV? What about her serial? Isn't it time for it to start?

Rahul: Cable connection has gone down.

Anjali: Great. Goodbye then.

Rahul: Common Anjali, don't get frustrated. We have very little time, say something nice.

Anjali: I don't have anything to say.

Rahul: Anjali.

Anjali: What?

Rahul: You want a kiss?

Anjali: Shut up!

Rahul: Fine, here it comes...

Anjali: I don't want...

Rahul: Who is asking you, I am just giving it...Muaaahhhhh...

"Rahullllll....."
"Mom...ahhh...."

Anjali: Oh My God. What have you done...you are dead meat, Rahul. I am keeping the phone, bye.

"Here...water..."
"I...I...thanks...Mom.."
"Let me know if you want more..."

For a 9th standard guy, life couldn't have been so blank, as it was for Rahul at that moment. Having been caught red-handed, there was nothing he could do. It was the toughest moment of his life. He somehow lived through it, even I don't know how.

PS: Rahul never detailed to me the exact conversation that transpired between him and Anjali on that fateful day. Still, I tried to recreate it based on whatever little information he had given me and a little bit of imagination on my side.

Rahul, if you ever happen to read this, do let me know as to how close was my narration to what actually transpired between you and your girl. :P

What the hell is "Personal Space"?

2008-04-08T21:53:00.017+05:30

I wonder how many people know what is the significance of the term, "Personal Space". Having studied in Government run Schools(Kendriya Vidyalayas), we were never taught anything about "Personal Space". Neither, did I come across that term in my college days, still, I somehow knew what it meant.

After joining Infosys, I got to know more about it during my training, and in the initial days of my first project.

For the uninitiated, "Personal Space" is like an invisible bubble that surrounds us. If people move inside this bubble when they are near us or talking to us, it may make us feel uncomfortable.

Many who don't know much about "Personal Space", unknowingly end up respecting this space, one may call that decency or good mannerism. But, when one sees people who have spent more than a couple of years in a corporate world, disrespecting one's personal space rampantly, one ends up wondering what the hell have they learnt all this while.

This time, a lady happened to breach my personal space, not once, not twice, not thrice...FOUR times.

The most common scenario where this "Personal Space" gets breached, is when you are in a queue. It has happened to me at times, wherein the person at my back tries to get as close as possible, not to me, but to the counter. I somehow really get irritated when they breach it and end up brushing themselves against me.

I just try to move a little forward making sure that, I don't breach the "Personal Space" of the person in front of me. Seeing me move forward, the person behind me, advances further, breaching my "Personal Space", AGAIN...Grrrr...

At times, even giving a serious look on that person's face doesn't pay off. I wonder why people, who have lived in the corporate world for over a couple of years, behave in such a stupid way that is so unbecoming a professional.

Yesterday, at one of the food courts, a lady ended up breaching my "Personal Space", not once, not twice, not thrice...FOUR times. From her looks she seemed to be well mannered and professional. If she was in a real hurry, she could have very well asked me to let her go in front of me, instead of brushing against me again and again.

Well, some people would expect a guy to "enjoy" such breaches from a girl into his "Personal Space", but, I don't like it whether it's a guy or a girl...

Wait, lemme take a bailable warrant, before your naughty mind starts straining itself...

I am perfectly straight. Don't even try to think otherwise. It's just that I don't like people getting touchy touchy, even if it is unknowingly or out of ignorance.

Coming back to the incident, I could have reacted in two ways. I could have either asked her to keep distance or I could have just moved out of her way politely. At that instance, with people around us, I opted for the second alternative, as I didn't want to put her in an awkward situation, by asking her to keep a distance.

Now when I look back, I feel the best thing that I could do at that moment was to politely ask her- "Madam, are you in a hurry? If yes, then please proceed, I will move aside". It wouldn't have offended her, but would have conveyed the point to her properly.

Anyways, it didn't strike me at that time, and there is no point in thinking over it again. Only thing that I could do after the incident to air out my frustration was to, well, blog about it.

I sincerely hope that people reading my post know what "Personal Space" means. But in case, if someone doesn't know, then I would just like to say that:-

"Do yourself a favor, go read some article on "Personal Space". It has got nothing to do with the gender of a person. Whether you are a girl or a guy, please respect the "Personal Space" of a person irrespective of gender."

"Also, get into your head that - a queue doesn't progress based on the distance between you and the person just ahead of you in the queue. You won't get out from the queue, even a second earlier, even if you try to get as close as possible to the person right in front of you."

I looked at her, she looked at me.

2008-04-04T22:29:00.011+05:30

On a cloudy evening, as I was having a cup of tea with one of my friends at a food court(restaurant) in our company, a lady walked past and sat a couple tables after us, facing towards my side.

She was alone.

From a distance, she appeared to be a very simple, calm and composed lady.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

Somehow the topic of discussion with my friend at that moment happened to be “Girrrrrrrrlssss”.

My friend, who calls himself an “expert flirt”, explained at length how girls think, especially when guys are around. He said that, the moment a girl senses that some guy is noticing her, she will become very conscious. For majority(not all) of the girls, this consciousness would turn into showing off ostentatiously.

According to him, making a girl say to herself in her mind – “I am a Princess”, is no big a deal. Only thing that a guy needs to do is, just keep looking(not staring) at her, in an "artistic" way, which will make her think that your eyes chose her out from the crowd.

“Not all girls are like that”, I said.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

“Majority are”, he replied.

“Well, let me try this on the girl sitting over there”, no…not to my friend, it would have been another disaster had I told him…I actually told that to myself.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

This time, it was more than just a look. What my friend said, seemed to have already started working with her. She somehow seemed to assume that I was “noticing” her, whereas I was just checking out whether she also fell in to that category of “Majority”.

Meanwhile, our conversation on “Girrrrrrrrlssss” continued, I must say it was quite interesting. He was speaking about one funny incident that happened in a restaurant, wherein the boy friend of a girl gave my friend a serious look, as she thought he was “staring at her”.

My friend, who was actually looking at the girl behind this couple’s table, was caught by surprise at this. He said, “Some girls have a feeling that, the moment they step out, everyone starts looking at them. They think they are Cleopatras”.

All through the conversation, I continued with my testing, with timed glances at the girl. Her getting conscious was becoming more and more evident. The look that she had now was way different from the first look she exchanged with me.

Now her looks were more serious, with one of those eyebrows raised.

She was running her fingers through her hairs frequently.

She would look left and right, and then look straight at me, with that serious look, and then look down into her plate.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

It was very funny. I was laughing from inside. Even though she was pretending to be serious from outside, she would have been happy from inside, if not much, an iota of it, for the sheer fact that she was being noticed by a guy, no matter whether she found him to be handsome or not.

She finished her snacks, and got up from her seat.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

She started walking towards our side with her plate.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

She just passed by me.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

“Why are you smiling”, asked my friend.

“Nothing, majority of girls are like that”, I replied.

“Like what?”, he asked.

“Nothing, let’s go”, I said turning back.

I looked for her but couldn't find her.

I bid farewell to my friend and came out of the food court. While walking I was thinking about her. “Poor girl, hope I didn’t make her feel uncomfortable in a wrong way”, I said to myself.

As I walked past the ATM counter near the food court, I felt as if someone in the queue was looking at me. I turned my head, it was that same girl.

I looked at her, she looked at me.

Not very evident, but this time she seemed to smile, in a very mild way.

I laughed, not in the open but in my mind. I probably knew what was she saying to herself at that time.

"I am a princess."

PS: With all due respect to all the wonderful ladies out there, it was just an attempt at having a naughty post on something that to an extent is true about majority of the girls. Please don't take off your sandals the next time you see me. :P

Tadaan...Tadaan...

2008-03-29T12:31:00.025+05:30

It was a Friday evening. I left early from office, to be precise, I took the 5:30pm bus. Fridays have always been sweet and pleasant. I would either be traveling to my hometown, Cochin, or would be charting out plans for the weekend with my roommates.

Instead of getting down at the bus stop next to our place, I usually get down a couple of stops before, which is close to my roommates' office. We coordinate amongst ourselves and go together for dinner.

This time since it was early, we thought of hanging out at Forum Mall and buy a couple of DVDs for the weekend.

The traffic was pretty smooth and we made it within a decent amount of time. I got down from the bus and started walking towards my roommates' office. I wanted to change the song playing in my MP3 Player. I put my hands inside my jeans' pocket to take it out and change the song.

Alas! My jeans was wet !!!

Hailing from a place which receives a major chunk of monsoon showers, the relationship with umbrellas started a long time back in my life.

Wait....before you jump into conclusion that my jeans got wet in rain, let me tell you, its not exactly so. In fact only the area close to my left pocket was wet.

So what exactly was it? Well, read on...

In my case, the courtship between umbrella and rain was always at cross roads. The day I used to take umbrella, expecting it to rain, it wouldn't rain. Instead, it would rain cats and dogs on the day when the umbrella lied safely in the confines of my room, and I got myself drenched. Grrrr...

After coming to Bangalore, I rarely used to take my umbrella out with me. This time when I went to Cochin, I took along my umbrella with me for servicing, expecting the intermittent "Mango Showers" in Bangalore.

Last Monday, it rained heavily in the evening, and thankfully this time I had my umbrella with me. None of my project-mates in office had it.

Excited and ecstatic, I put a post in BB. BB or Bulletin Board is an online discussion forum in Infosys. A place where talented people of varied tastes and interests air out their views on discussions. BB at Infosys Bangalore, is accessible to over 19 thousand employees in the campus.

Whenever I feel like taking a break from work, or don't have anything to do, I get on to BB and put my two cents to discussions happening there, most of which are humorous and in lighter vein.

Following was the post that I posted on BB - "It's raining cats and dogs outside. I have got my umbrella with me...tadaan...tadaan... :P". It was a direct attempt at making people without umbrellas jealous, through BB.

The same thing happened again on Friday. It was raining heavily as I was about to leave. Just to sign off from BB in style for the weekend, I put the following post to an ongoing discussion on 'rain'.

My post read -"It's raining heavily outside. Today also I have got my umbrella with me...tadaan...tadaan... :P"

Yet another attempt at seeking a sadistic pleasure, by laughing indirectly at people who didn't have an umbrella.

Seeing my post in BB, and having an envious smile on my face, I shutdown my system and headed out of our building with my friend. We saw many people standing close to the entrance, expecting someone to come in with the Infosys umbrella, which they could in turn use to get to the company bus stop.

Seeing them wait there I had a laugh in my heart - "See see...I have my umbrella with me...see..see..."

My friend and I parted our ways on reaching the bus stop. I got into our bus and sat on the window seat. While commuting to office and back home in bus, I listen to songs on my MP3 Player, something without which traveling seems to be a curse, especially on the crazy Bangalore roads.

By the time our bus reached my bus stop, majority of the people in the bus had already got down and only a very few remained. I got down and started walking towards my roommates' office. I put my hands inside my jeans' left pocket to take my MP3 Player out and change the song.

Alas! My jeans was wet !!!

How the hell could my jeans get wet? I mean, I didn't get wet in the rain, then how?

Then it struck me. It was my umbrella. My umbrella, which I had kept on the left side of my seat.

Damn...

I forgot to take my umbrella...

I turned back, my bus had already left. Even though I could see it, it had covered a decent distance. My umbrella, my beloved umbrella, the bus was taking it away from me, shall I run to it?

I chose not to. It was a sad feeling initially, feeling of having lost something dear to me.

But wait...

I no longer had my umbrella. I no longer had my umbrella with me... :P

The sad feeling within me suddenly changed into a smile. I was laughing at myself from inside. I was wondering what people in BB would think when they get to know that, the guy who was trying to make people jealous about having an umbrella, lost it.

Now, he didn't have an umbrella to go "tadaan...tadaan..." over it. :D

Yet again, I had made a fool out of myself.

My smile turned into giggle. Right then two pretty ladies went past me, who gave me a strange look on seeing me giggle. "What a jerk...", that's precisely what they would have thought. But then, that didn't dither my spirits, I kept on laughing at me and my stupidity from inside.

The moment I saw my friends, I burst into laughter. "Have you gone crazy?", they asked a very sensible question. It wasn't long before they also started laughing at me, rather at my stupidity.

I said, I am gonna blog about this. To this, one of them asked yet another sensible question.

He: "Are you genuinely stupid, or, you do such stupid things just to blog about them?"

Me: "I...aaa...,I...aaa...,I...aaa..."

He: "You indeed are nuts..."

Me: "I...aaa............." :D

PS: Thanks to the wonderful people at Transport Department and Security at Infosys, a couple of calls and my umbrella found its way to the security safe room at Infosys Bangalore in an hour's time. I will have my umbrella back on Monday...tadaan...tadaan... :D

Dad, I am coming home.

2008-03-26T21:21:00.002+05:30

Disclaimer: Kindly skip this post if you don't have 15mins to spare. I tried my level best to keep it as short as possible, but it has turned out to be the lengthiest post in my blog. Hence, read at your own risk.

"A guy, with a back-pack, is running on one of the busiest streets in Bangalore. Squeezing through the space left between vehicles jam-packed in the traffic.

Having already run for a kilometer and half, his body is slowly losing the battle, his muscles are giving up. Drenched in sweat and gasping for breath, the only thought that’s running through his mind, is to hold on and not to give up till he gets onto the train, which will take him to his home, where two souls are anxiously waiting for him.

He doesn’t know whether he is running in the right direction, he has no idea as to how long will the ordeal last.

Still, he is running."

Well, time indeed pulls out some of the craziest and most thrilling moments of our, otherwise normal lives. I happened to go through such a crazy and thrilling experience last Thursday.

It was a great day, with our team going to Silver Oak Resort, Devanahalli, for our Project Party. My train to Cochin was supposed to start from Bangalore City Railway Station at 6:50pm. As per plan, I was dropped by one of my projectmates at a place called Mekhri Circle, which is 4.6kms from the Railway Station.

5:25pm

I saw an auto coming from a distance. Seeing me with a backpack, the auto driver slowed down. He stopped right in front of me with a smile.

He:“Kidhar jaana hai Boss?”
Me:“Majestic Railway Station”
He:“Aao, baitho”
Me:“Bhai, meter mein jayega?”
He:“Haan…Boss”

I was happy to hear that he would charge me only the usual meter fare, which meant just Rs.30-40.

I took out my mobile and gave a call to my roommates with whom I was supposed to travel in the train. They had already started from their place and said would take half-an-hour to reach the station. I somehow got a feeling that I would make it to the station before them.

5:40pm

I called up my parents and told them that I was on my way to the station. While I was talking to my parents I noticed that the driver was asking other auto-drivers the way to the Railway Station. I expected him to know the way.

Me:“Bhai, station jaane ka rasta nahi patha kya?”
He:“Nahi Boss, mein short cut pooch raha tha…”

I was glad that this guy was concerned about me. He wanted me to reach the station as soon as possible. I decided to give him some extra money once I get down at the station.

6:05pm

We were progressing at snail's pace. The traffic was pretty bad. I just had a look at the meter and to my surprise it read, Rs.62. The meter seemed to be running faster than the auto.

Me:“Bhai, yeh meter tho aapki gaadi se bhi zyada tez bhagta hai…”
He:“Kya Boss, aisa math bolo…”
Me:“Aur nahi tho kya…khair,kitna time lagega?”
He:“10mins Boss”

"10 more mins, that should be fine", I told myself, gazing at the long queue of vehicles infront of us.

6:12pm

After a few minutes, I saw us going underneath a bridge, which we had gone through from the opposite side around 10 minutes back. Man, was this guy looking for a short cut or was he lost?

Me:“Bhai, aapko rasta theek se path hai kya…?”
He:“Haan Boss…bass 5 mins…”
Me:“Aap mujhe seedha le jaao…short cut math lo…”

I was kind of irritated. He actually didn’t know the way to the railway station, and that was the reason why he was asking other auto-drivers which turns to take.

6:24pm

We were stuck in a traffic signal for close to 10mins. This was it. I couldn’t take it anymore, I was going to get down.

Me: “Bhai, station aur kitna dur hai?”
He: “2 ya 3 kilometers...”
Me: “2 ya 3 kilometers...??”
He: “Aap beitho mein aapko, pahuncha doonga...”
Me: “Aap jabtak pahunchaoge, meri train Bangalore chod ke chali jayegi...”

I asked him how much I need to pay him for the ride that he took me on. “Boss, 84 rupees”.

Irritated with him and with my mind lost in the thoughts of calculating the distance to the station, I just gave him that money. I asked the adjacent auto-driver as to how far would the station be and which way to go. As per him the station was 3kms from the place where we were stuck in traffic.

Man, Mekhri Circle to the station is just 4.6kms, what the hell was my auto driver doing in the past 60 odd minutes? He took me just 1.6kms closer to my destination and charged Rs.84/-

If I ever see him again, I will twist his ears as my headmistress in school used to do. Grrrr......

Anyways, there was no time to get back to him and take out my anger. I had to run, run for my train.

6:25pm

I was quite confident that I would cover 3kms in 25mins. I started running, this time it wasn’t for my tummy, it was for me.

At a distance, the road seemed to split in two directions. I asked a guy who was standing at the nearby bus stop. He told me to take a left and keep going straight.

I took the left and kept running. It would have been less than a hundred meters and I felt as if the road was leading to a narrow lane. Was this the right way?

6:30pm

I asked a lady whether this was the way to railway station. NO, she said. She asked me to go back, and take a left at the first junction. Grrrr………that meant, the guy at the bus stop showed me the wrong way, I had to take a right there instead of left. I was getting more and more frustrated.

I started running back. I was looking for that guy who showed me the wrong way, but luckily he wasn’t there. For my satisfaction I asked two guys at the junction, the way to the station. Both directed me in the direction that the lady had told.

6:35pm

I had been running for close to 10mins, I was getting exhausted. Luckily, I saw some autos waiting at a signal which was about to go green in a few seconds. I prayed for an empty auto. I saw one, and just got into it and with gasping breath I said, “Bhai… railway station jaana hai…meri train 10mins mein chutne vaali hai…”

He was an elderly person. He asked me not to worry, and that he will try his level best. We got a green, and started moving. I was glad to see the traffic in motion.

It wasn’t even a minute and the traffic again came to a standstill at the next traffic signal. There wasn’t any other way, I had to run. Before getting down from the 2nd auto, I asked the way to the railway station. He explained it properly. He asked me to keep running on the left side of the road, so that if he sees me, he could stop and get me in again. I gave him Rs.15 and thanked him for his concern.

6:36pm

I kept running, this time it was more stressful than before. But, I tried to maintain a steady pace. I cleared two traffic signals.

6:40pm

I was getting more and more exhausted with each step. My mind was running at a pace much faster than my legs. What if I don’t make it? My train, our plans at home, my 3 wonderful days….

NO…I am not gonna give up. I have to keep running. I had waited for this since more than a month and a half, and I can’t just let it go like that. At any cost, I had to be at the station before 6:50pm.

Even though your heart and mind asks you to keep going, at times the body would just not listen to it. My body was slowly getting into that groove.

6:42pm

I saw a guy on a bike, who was keeping his mobile in his pocket after making a call. There was a surge of adrenaline in my body. I ran to him and told him that my train would leave in 5mins. He had a Wipro id card hung up on his neck. I pleaded him to help me out. But, he said he had to go to some other place. I told him that it was very important for me to go home this time, I even went to the extent of saying “I will pay you how much ever you want, just help me reach the railway station”. He didn’t bother to reply to it and drove off.

I felt very bad, really very bad. I would never have done that to a person in a similar situation, never ever.

There were just 8minutes left for the train to start, and I had no sight of the station or landmarks close to it. I was running on a deserted road between two traffic signals.

I didn’t know how far I had to run. I wasn’t sure as to whether I was running on the right path. I wasn’t sure whether my body could sustain the ordeal till I reach the station.

I just knew that, I had to run.

6:43pm

I heard a car honking from behind. The traffic from the previous signal started flowing in. I saw an auto coming, and I literally stood in front of it waving with both my hands. By God’s grace it was an empty auto. I got in and told the driver that my train would leave in a few minutes and I didn’t want to miss it. I guess, more than those words, my pathetic state - drenched in sweat and making noise while gasping for breath, conveyed the urgency to him.

He drove at the maximum speed he could, yelling at people to give way. He told me that he would stop me at the bus stop just opposite to the railway station. That meant I had to jump over the railings on both sides of the median, and cross the road onto railway station’s side.

6:44pm

The auto came to a screeching halt. I gave him Rs.20, and thanked my heart out.

Now, the next challenge for me was to cross over from this side of the road to the opposite side. As usual the traffic on both sides was crazy. There was no point in my waiting for the vehicles to clear off. With prayers in my heart and both my hands raised, I started crossing one side of the road towards the median. Thankfully, I could get to the median without a single scratch.

The 3 foot wide median had 4-5 feet high railings on both the sides. I could easily jump over. But, wait… barbwires were wound on the railings, so that people don’t jump over it.

I started looking for a place where the barbwire wasn’t wound properly so that I could safely place my hands. Luckily, I could find such a gap. I pulled myself up and jumped into the median.

6:45pm

Again, I looked for a place where the barbwire wasn’t wound properly. This time, I wasn’t lucky. I bent the pointed ends of the barb wire at two places, so that it doesn’t pierce into my palm. I gripped the railing, pulled myself up, and landed myself at a steady pace onto the road.

Now, the only thing that stood between me and the railway station was the road. I lifted both my hands and started crossing the road. I could hear some of the drivers yelling at me.

To my own disbelief, I crossed the road without a single scratch, again.

6:46pm

I saw my train’s name in the big LED screen, which one can see from a very long distance. It was at platform No.5…Damn…

I kept running with whatever energy was left in me. I could hear myself make noises gasping for breath. I could see people turning back on hearing the noise and gazing at me. I wanted to stop making the noise, but I couldn’t. Somehow, it didn’t seem to be under my control.

6:47pm

From the over-bridge I could see a train lying at Platform 5. That was my train. It wasn’t moving.

My legs and abdomen were aching like hell, still, after reaching this far, how could I give up? I would never have forgiven myself, if I had given up at that point.

I had to run. I hopped down the stairs, and finally set my foot on Platform 5. My train was lying there, motionless.

6:48pm

I don’t know whether it was the slight drizzle or sweat or what…but my eyes went moist.

I made it. Against all odds, I made it.

I was going home. I was going to my parents who had been anxiously waiting for their son. I was going to the place where I belong. I was going home.

I bought some fruits for my parents, a bottle of water and a biscuit. My mobile had been ringing continuously since a couple of minutes. I finally took the call. It was my roommate. He asked me where I was, I said “at the station, a few feet away from our train”.

6:49pm

I got into the train, met my other roommates and friends, kept my bag on the berth, and walked back towards the door to wash my face. While washing my hands, I noticed that I had a couple of cuts on my left palm, the blood had clotted. I cleaned the wounds properly, one of which seemed to be the result of the pointed edge of the barb wire piercing in. That meant a visit to the doctor the next day for tetanus injection.

6:50pm

I took out my mobile and dialed my Dad’s number. He picked up.

“Dad, I am coming home.”

He somehow could sense that my ride to the station wasn’t that easy, he asked me if I was fine. Mom took the call and enquired whether I had dinner. She wished me good night, and gave back the phone to Dad.

He just said - “Come fast, I will be waiting for you at the station tomorrow morning.”

6:51pm

The train started moving. I was going home.

Thoda hai…thode ki zaroorat hai…

2008-02-25T17:14:00.024+05:30

Thoda hai…thode ki zaroorat hai…

That’s a famous song from an old Bollywood movie, which in English means “Have little…need a little more”.

How true, isn’t it?

Well, it’s human to have the drive to achieve more in life, and there is nothing wrong in it. In fact these days I, like many others, have been wondering as to how much will be my salary hike this time. With the present slowdown in US economy due to Subprime crisis and the appreciating Rupee, I just hope that I get a decent hike, if not more.

Coming back to the point of wanting for more; in the pursuit to achieve new things we quite often forget to appreciate the value of things we already have with us. Things whose real worth could be gauged by people who don’t have it with them.

One such thing, which we have with us and take it for granted is, our ability to see this beautiful world with our eyes.

Yesterday morning, I and my roommates went to Jyothi Seva Home for Blind, Bangalore, for “breakfast serving”- one of the initiatives started off by Aashayein Foundation,an NGO based in Bangalore.

There were over 100 inmates in there; some with partial eye sights and some with none, most of them were kids below 10years. I had seen visually challenged people in my life before, but I had never been to such a place.

It’s said that when God takes away something from a person, He blesses that person with something else to overcome the shortcomings. These kids also seemed to be blessed by God with extra abilities to compensate for their disability. It was amazing to see the way they came into the dining hall, on their own, without any help. They knew exactly how many steps and turns to take to reach the hall from their rooms in the various floors.

During the initial few minutes as the kids walked in, I couldn’t help but wonder as to how they would perceive this world.

Did they know how they looked like?

Did they know how this world looked like?

Did they know the difference between day and night?

Did they realize that there is a world beyond darkness?

Did they know what seeing meant?

Usually, when people like us see fellow human beings with some disabilities, a feeling of sympathy grows within our heart for them. The same was the case with me initially.

But as time went on I realized that they were happy in their own world, sharing a rapport with each other, helping each other, cracking jokes, tapping their feet whenever some music was played. They didn’t seem to have any complaints with their lives. They seemed to be happy and content.

The time that I spent there, changed my initial feeling of sympathy towards those kids into respect and admiration.

It was inspiring to see them smile and play with each other.

It was inspiring to see them run down the stairs at a pace faster than ours.

It was inspiring to see them enjoying their life even with their limitations.

The most inspiring thing was to see one of them dancing to a famous Bollywood song.

I just wondered whether that kid knew how did it look when his hands and legs moved in sync with the music. I wondered whether he knew how he looked when he danced. That sight was really very touching, something which I can’t express in words.

Those wonderful kids taught me one of the biggest lessons of life in their own unique way, that, we should always appreciate and realize the value of everything that God has blessed us with. We always long for things that we don’t have with us, but forget to look at what we have with us.

Its quite obvius that, in the pursuit to survive in this competitive world, we may stumble, meet defeats and failures and, life might seem to be harsh and unfair at us.

In case you find yourself in such a situation, where you are disappointed at not having something with you, do yourself a favor; just try to visualize that kid who danced his heart out.

Try to visualize the kid who swung his arms and legs in sync with the music, without even knowing how he looked like while dancing.

Try to visualize the kid who even though hasn't seen the colors, has drawn a colorful picture of this world in his heart.

Try to visualize the beautiful world he would have conceived in his mind even though he hasn’t seen this world of ours.

Try to visualize the smile and happiness on his face, which made up for the eyes he didn’t have.

Just take out a couple of minutes and think of that kid, probably it will help you in appreciating the beautiful life that God has gifted you with.

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The Jyothi Seva Society aims at helping the visually challenged, to discover their own dignity and values, and to bring out the best in themselves.

Address:
Jyothi Seva Home For the Blind
1st Main Road, Venkateshpura
Arabic College
Bangalore - 560045
Phone: 080-25477972

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PS: Dedicated to all the "differently-abled" people in this world.

Taare Zameen Par

2008-02-07T23:50:00.005+05:30

No, this blog is not about the movie Taare Zameen Par. It’s about those wonderful moments that I had last weekend.

I drew a painting, one that brought me closer to four spirited kids, who gave me an insight into their colorful world and gifted me with one of the most cherished moments of my life.

On Saturday morning, I and two of my room-mates went to Sahakari Vidya Kendra, Jayanagar, Bangalore , as part of an initiative, started off by Aashayein Foundation,an NGO based in Bangalore , working towards the empowerment of under-privileged children through education.

The school predominantly had children from the economically weaker sections of the society, and most of them landed there because of kind hearted people and noble organizations like Aashayein. The purpose of the visit was to have a close interaction with kids, on the sidelines of a drawing competition, to gather useful information through questionnaires prepared by the Foundation, which would in turn help in identifying, planning and executing some upcoming projects by Aashayein Foundation, aimed at helping such kids.

At the school we, the volunteers, split ourselves into teams and got ourselves assigned to specific classes. Our team was supposed to take care of 3rd standard kids. As we entered the classroom, we were greeted by smiling faces, which also had some amount of anxiousness blended in them. We distributed drawing sheets, pencils, erasers and colors to the kids, and told them to draw whatever they liked.

Usually, it takes some time for small kids to get friendly, especially with complete strangers. It actually isn’t that easy to break into their comfort zones, as it may seem from outside. Moreover, for people like me language was a problem, as we could hardly communicate in Kannada. But, fortunately, some of the kids in our class knew Tamil, a language that I can somehow manage with.

Having come as part of a drawing competition, some of us thought of joining the kids in their artistic pursuit, with our pencil and crayons, to break into their comfort zones and get closer to their world. I could identify a group of 4 kids who seemed to communicate among themselves in Tamil. I went straight to them with my drawing sheet and crayons, and took a seat just next to them.

I greeted and shook hands with them. Ganesh, Arvind, Anbazhgan and Siva were a bunch of spirited kids. Ganesh, the most talkative among them was drawing something that really made me realize how limit less the thoughts of kids are, thoughts which don’t have any boundaries.

We would usually expect kids to draw cliché things like a house, animals, trees, river, car or some person. What was coming up on Ganesh’s drawing sheet was something that actually took me by surprise. He was drawing “his state – Karnataka”, by looking into a book which had Karnataka’s map. The very concept of drawing something like that was totally new to me. I mean, who will even “think” of drawing something like that, forget about someone actually taking pains to draw it. That indeed was inspiring.

He seemed to be a very religious person, with stickers of all famous Gods and Goddesses on his writing pad. It was interesting to see the vigor with which he explained about each one of them to me. Meanwhile, Arvind was trying to sketch a dancer(whom Ganesh called Prabhu Deva), Anbazhgan was busy bringing up a car on his drawing sheet, and then there was Siva who very smartly was tracing Rajanikant on to his drawing sheet from a magazine cut out.

I asked them to suggest me what I should draw. Ganesh told me to draw mountains with the Sun rising. Slowly, the other 3 started to pour in with their suggestions, a river with a boat, an over-bridge across the river, birds – 7 of them, split in two groups of 5 and 2(on special request by Arvind), clouds, trees and a house.

After almost one hour of playing around with colors and having fun with each other, we had our paintings ready. Ganesh was done with the Karnataka map, Arvind had a dancer posing on his drawing sheet, Anbazhgan had the car at display on his drawing sheet and Siva had Rajanikant on his sheet.

My drawing sheet had the Sun, mountains, clouds, birds, trees, river, a boat, an over-bridge and a house, all of which had taken birth in the minds of those 4 wonderful kids. We rated each-other’s paintings and all of them were generous enough to give me 8/10 !!!

Amidst all that fun of one hour, I tried to get as much as I could from them about their life, their problems, their needs, their hopes, their dreams and expectations and filled the questionnaires that were handed over to me. All four of them seemed to be from poor families, which were trying hard to make the ends meet. Even though they put up all their problems in a very casual way, it was really touching to hear all that.

Hopefully all the information that we collected for Aashayein Fundation, will someday, help such kids in one way or the other. The results of the painting competitions were announced at the school assembly ground, with all kids lined up in a well disciplined and organized manner. Unfortunately, my kids couldn’t get any prize, but they seemed to be more than content with the quality time that we spent together with each-other, talking about colors, studies, sports, movies, stars and life.

It was with mixed feelings that I bid farewell to my new friends and the school.

Hope I go back to that school someday soon, and do something for those spirited kids, who forgot all the miseries in their personal lives in those couple of hours that we spent together and made me realize that, there are indeed lots of small stars like Ganesh in this world, among us, whom we usually fail to identify in the crowd.

Excuse me, you have lost your card.

2008-02-02T22:59:00.007+05:30

Many a times, we end up making a big fool of ourselves, no matter how smart we consider ourselves to be.

Yesterday evening, it happened to me.

I had gone to one of the ICICI Bank ATM counters in our campus, to withdraw cash from the ATM. There was a pretty long queue at the ATM counter. After waiting for a while, my turn came and I got into the counter which had 3 ATM machines.

I punched in all the required details, and waited for my request to get processed. I collected the money and the balance slip and walked out of the counter, to Food World, which was just a few feet away. Seeing the long queue in there, I thought of going back to my cubicle and coming later.

As I was walking back, I saw a man with an ATM card in his hand, looking around for the person who lost it.

The first thing that stroke my mind was that, it’s the card of the girl who was in the ATM counter at the adjacent vending machine to mine, while I was taking out money.

Luckily, I could see the girl at a distance talking to one of her friends. I walked to her thinking in my mind that the poor girl would be wondering where her card is, and I will be the person who would give her some respite. :P

I went to her and this is what happened next:-

Me: Hey, you seem to have forgotten your debit card at the counter.

The Girl: Who? Me?

Me: Yes, do you see that guy over there, walking towards the Bank with a card in his hand? It’s your card, that he is holding.

The Girl: That is not my card, that is yours, you forgot it at the ATM counter.

Me: Whaaaaaaaaaa…at? My card? Oh ya…thanks…

Man, one should have been at my place at that moment to really understand what went through my mind, what great feeling I had, I am not getting words to express it. Probably to put it in simple words, it was just awesome!!!

I rushed back to the guy who was walking with that card of mine to the ICICI Bank adjacent to the ATM counter. By the time I reached, he had given it to an ICICI guy there. I, the Hero, walk into the bank, smile at the guy walking back after leaving my card in safe hands, and say “Thank you, that was my card”.

The guy gave back a smile, which lingered in my mind for some time, I wondered whether he was laughing inside thinking what big an idiot I was, after seeing all that happened.

Meanwhile, I told the ICICI guy at the bank that it was my card. He asked for my id card and returned it, with a smile. Again that smile seemed to be hiding a laugh at a guy, who so beautifully had made an idiot out of himself.

Coming out from the bank, I didn’t look left and right, just kept walking straight. I hardly could control from laughing at myself. I called up my friend and shared this incident with him. I guess doing it was a big mistake, as the intensity of my laughs increased, so much so that I had to cut the call, to regain my normal self.

Before I hung up the call, I told him that I am gonna blog about it. He asked whether I was nuts to dig my own grave by letting everyone know the way I made a fool out of myself. But, I somehow couldn’t help myself from writing this.

It’s really fun to look back at our own foolishnesses and laugh at them. Oh my God…what big a fool I made out of myself…

Me: Hey, you seem to have forgotten your debit card at the counter.

The Girl: Who? Me?

Me: Yes, do you see that guy over there, walking towards the Bank with a card in his hand? It’s your card, that he is holding.

The Girl: That is not my card, that is yours, you forgot it at the ATM counter.

That sounded as if she was trying to say "Oye Maamu tu kis duniyan mein hai...woh mera nahi, tera card hai re...dhakkan kahin ka..." :D

The value of a smile.

2008-01-09T20:54:00.002+05:30

Scene 1: An Infoscion(that's how an employee at Infosys is addressed), goes to the cafeteria in his building to fill water in his bottle. There a house keeping person(who is responsible for keeping the floors clean) is filling water in her bottle, and on seeing the Infoscion coming over with an empty bottle in hand, she immediately steps aside even without filling her bottle completely. The Infoscion lost in his own world goes on and fills his bottle and just walks to his cubicle, without even bothering to look at the face of the house keeping staff who had stepped aside for him.

Scene 2: The same Infoscion starts from his cubicle for lunch. When he reaches the entrance of his building, he sees N. R. Narayana Murthy, Founder, Chairman and Chief Mentor of Infosys, on the other side of the door. Thanking his fortunes on that day, the Infoscion politely opens the door for NRN(that's how he is know across the company) and waits till NRN walks in. On seeing this guy opening the door for him NRN thanks the Infoscion with a smile. The Infoscion is so delighted that he rushes back to his cubicle and informs everyone over there from his project about the incident.

These are two different situations which actually have many things in common.

Quite often we fail to notice small gestures of goodwill, of generosity, of benevolence, of modesty, of compassion by people around us.

Even if we notice it, we fail to reciprocate to it, to appreciate it or even to acknowledge it. Especially if it’s from a person who belongs to the lower strata compared to us in terms of the unwritten standards defined by the society, be it in terms of occupation, financial capability, education or even appearance.

But it’s a different case when someone more superior to us or at a higher position, acknowledges us or our deeds.

The Infoscion whose day was made by a smile and “Thank You” by NRN, someone whom he looks up with lot of respect, failed miserably on his part, when he didn’t even bother to look at the house keeping staff who stepped aside so that he could fill his bottle of water.

We in our lives have failed many a times like that. So many times that, we wouldn’t be able to even recollect them.

Even today we would have missed to appreciate a small gesture of goodwill from someone….

From the driver who stopped the bus on seeing us running towards it, even though it was not a designated stop…

From the security guard who helped us in opening our bag for security check while entering the campus…

From the person who waited at the door, so that we could pass through it first…

From the person who stopped the lift door from closing on seeing us rush to the lift…

From the person who served us food…

From the person who cleaned our table at the food court before we sat there…

From the person who replied to our query we put up in "Bulletin Board", an online discussion forum accessible to all employees across the company…

From the person who came in to clean our cubicle…

There are many more instances like this. These are just a few among them that came into my mind in a flash.

I am sure we would have missed at least one among them, at least one gesture, which could have been reciprocated with just a simple smile.

At times we are hesitant to take the first step, thinking whether our smile will be reciprocated by the other person or not. Well, don’t think too much, if someone is too tired to give you a smile, leave one of your own, because no one needs a smile as much as those who have none to give.

Occupation, financial strength, education and social status don’t tell the real worth of a person. It’s the way how he/she acknowledges and reciprocates to the small gestures of goodwill, of generosity, of benevolence, of modesty, of compassion by fellow human beings, that says how worthy he/she is.

It's time for all of us to do an introspection of ourselves as to whether we are really worthy individuals.

It’s time for us to realize the value of a smile.

Should I do it or not?

2007-12-21T14:07:00.005+05:30

Quite often we find ourselves in a confused situation, asking ourselves, whether I should do it or not.

I still remember those days in school when teachers used to ask questions to the class. Even though there were very rare occasions, where I knew the answers of the questions that were being asked in the class, I was always hesitant to let them out.

The main reason behind the hesitation was that, the confidence to get it right always used to get overpowered by the worry about being wrong, and getting embarrassed in front of the entire class.

But, the biggest disappointment used to come, when somebody else answered the question with the words in my mind, and got cheers from the entire class and pat from the teacher….grrr….

It used to be a strange, creepy feeling…a feeling of having lost an opportunity…chehhh…

Well, that’s just one of those situations where we quite often find ourselves with our feet set on boats moving in opposite directions.

Yesterday, while going back home in our company bus, I found myself in such a situation. I was a sitting in a three seater, with another guy, whom I didn’t know. In the seat just in front of us, there was a guy and a girl, they also didn’t seem to know each other.

As our bus reached one of its designated stops, the lady who was sitting along with him in the 3 seater, got up and started moving to the door. At that moment the guy “seemed” to call that lady from back, “Seemed” because I couldn’t hear what he was saying, as my ears were choked with sound waves coming out of my mp3 players earphones.

It took my brain a few seconds to process the inputs received from my eyes, and come out with the picture of a guy calling a lady who forgot something in the bus, by that time she was on the foot board of the bus. Unfortunately, his voice couldn’t get through the sound waves coming out of her earphones and reverberating in her ears.

She got down from the bus, and the guy looked at her belonging lying on his adjacent seat for a while and continued with his ride.

At this moment, my old friend of school came back smiling at me. I started wondering whether I should get down from the bus, find that lady and hand over her belonging. Will that look odd? What if I am not able find the girl on the road?

Two equal and opposite forces started acting upon my decision making section of the brain. As the two forces tried to negate each other, our bus slowly started moving.

“Fine, this is now or never. I am getting down, gonna return that lady whatever she had forgotten in the bus. No second thoughts…”

“But…should I? hmm….hmm….hmm….”

By the time my humming ended, our bus had covered a considerable distance.

“Oh…ok…anyways, no point of thinking about it now…hope the guy who sat next to her takes her belonging with him and traces her back at office and returns it back…”

Done.

As I get down at the next stop, I just try to find out what’s lying on the seat, what did she forget to take….well, it’s her dabba…tiffin box… “hmmm…anyways, hope it gets back to its master…”

While on my way back home from the bus stop, my thoughts are stuck up on this incident. I know, I should have got down and given her the box, as my stop was just a few hundred yards, a walk-able distance for a guy who is anyways trying hard to get his tummy flat in the flat world, that he is part of now… :P

Well, no point of talking about it now. Hope that lady got back her tiffin box.

Probably the next time I find myself in such a situation, I don’t sit idle computing the pros and cons of the consequences of my action, rather I act and give myself some satisfaction, instead of that strange creepy feeling, that I am still to get away with after yesterday’s incident.

What sets apart man from machines?

2007-12-14T11:52:00.002+05:30

What sets apart man from machines?

Machines are created by human beings to carry out a specific task, in a specific way, which is determined by human beings. They are expected to act upon expected inputs in an expected manner and come out with an expected output, that’s it. They just do what they are programmed to do, neither a bit here nor there.

Reason? Well, quite obvious, because beyond a certain limit (specified by humans), machines don’t have the ability to reason, to plan, to solve problems, to think abstractly, to comprehend ideas and to learn.

Just imagine you develop a High-Tech Vehicle, which is designed/programmed to open its door at only specific points, say at bus bays which have intelligent transceivers(transmitter + receiver), that transmits some sort of signal every time the High-Tech Vehicle approaches the bus bay, the vehicle picks up this signal and the brakes are pulled automatically. The door then opens for the passengers to get down.

Sounds cool, right?

The point to be noted here is that the vehicle is designed in such a way that the door won’t open at any other intermediate point other than the designated stops. Even the driver won’t have the option to open it midway, unless and until the vehicle receives signals transmitted by the transceiver, it won’t open.

Now just imagine that the vehicle is stuck in a big traffic snarl, with the traffic coming to a complete standstill. The time is say 7:45pm, and there are some people waiting to get down at the next stop which is just 100 yards away.

There is a lady who is supposed to catch a bus to her native place at 8:00pm at the next stop.

There is a guy who has severe head-ache and wants to somehow reach a doctor as soon as possible.

There are two friends who are planning to buy a gift for their common friend whose marriage reception is there till 9:30pm.

Then there are other folks, who don’t have anything urgent lined up for the evening, and hence don’t mind waiting.

Having been stuck in the traffic for over 10mins, the people who want to get down become restless, they request the driver to open the door, but he is helpless, he can’t do anything as the door won’t unlock itself unless it receives the signal for it at the designated stop.

The passengers, through the window of their High-Tech Vehicle, helplessly see other people coming out of their ordinary vehicles and walking through the standstill traffic (point to be noted). People on the road gaze at the people within the High-Tech Vehicle and wonder how lucky are the people inside to have the privilege of traveling in such a High-Tech Vehicle.

The passengers have no other option but to wait for the traffic to clear off.

They sit inside the bus helplessly, wondering why the people, who designed the High-Tech Vehicle, didn’t take into consideration such a scenario.

Why didn’t the people put some more effort and design the door-opening system in such a way that, it would open automatically, every time the vehicle is at halt for more than 5mins or so, by having some timer based system?

Why didn’t the people come up with some laser guided system, which would track the movement around the vehicle and open the door at a point when there is no vehicular movement(in case of traffic snarls) on its sides, and the passengers can get down safely?

Wait…instead of all that, why didn’t the designers of the High-Tech Vehicle leave the option of opening the door in such a situation, at the discretion of the bus driver?

Is it some sort of rocket science to comprehend?

Or is it that the designers invested all their time in designing a safe system for the passengers, so much so that, they just didn’t ponder over this point?

Isn’t it the simplest and the most optimum solution at hand? If it is, then why don’t we make use of it?

Wouldn’t it ensure that the lady, who is supposed to catch the bus to her place at 8:00pm at the next stop, doesn’t miss it?

Wouldn’t it help the guy with severe head-ache to go to a doctor, take medication and reach his home at the earliest?

Wouldn’t it give the two friends enough time to select an appropriate gift for their friend who has invited them to celebrate one of the most important day’s of his/her life?

Man might not be the perfect creation of God, but he is blessed with the ability to reason, to plan, to solve problems, to think abstractly, to comprehend ideas and to learn.

That’s what exactly sets apart man from machines.

PS:This post is dedicated to one of the policies at a company, which left me wondering as to what sets apart man from machines.

Orkut Land

2007-11-28T13:12:00.002+05:30

“yo buddy!!! welcome to orkut!!! yippie i inaugrated ur scrapbook........ “ 5/17/06

Whoa…that’s the first ‘scrap’ that I got in my life…

Well, while drafting this write-up in MSWord, I tried to look out for the synonyms of this word that we all have today become familiar with, and this is what I got:- scrap => piece, bit, fragment, slip, wisp, particle, crumb, morsel.

Before the onset of Orkut Age, if it could be called so, we would have related the word scrap with the synonyms listed above, but today most of us relate it to a few lines dropped by someone at a place which any Tom Dick or Harry can peep into.

It could just be one line, one word, or even just a smiley. Well, as they say, “in this hi-tech age”, we can probably convey the same thing in 4 words, which our English teacher might need 4 sentences with proper grammar and punctuations, to convey. People who once used to write long stories and essays in their examination papers are now content with these few words today.

I personally know people who get very excited when they get to know that somebody has scrapped them. At times it’s funny to see the vigor in them for it. One day, I noticed one of my friends staring at his scrapbook, refreshing the page again and again. He kept that page open for almost 10mins or so. I went to him and asked him, what he was doing. His reply, straight and simple – “Waiting for a scrap”. Poor thing, it reminded of that dreaded day when I was waiting anxiously in front of my PC, for my board exam results.

The Orkut fever took its toll on me too. I also was addicted to it in the beginning, every new scrap was like Quality Walls ice cream to me. I was so crazy those days, sitting idle at home, waiting for my joining date at Infy. Seeing the number of scraps in my scrapbook, I used to get more and more motivated, it was as if “thoda hai…thode ki zaroorat hai”(famous hindi song, it means “have some…need some more”).

I used to chat with my friends through scraps, and all that while my Yahoo! Messenger icon used to smile at me in the taskbar. But naah…why would I get into a chat with Yahoo! Messenger, when my main intension was to drastically increase the number of scraps in my scrapbook, and overtake my friends.

Friends…well, the word friend was also on the to-do lists every day. With to-do list, I didn’t mean spending some time with friends…nope…I rather meant the other most important thing to-do in Orkut…increasing the friends list. In fact, that’s the sole criteria based on which your popularity in Orkut gets determined, so how would one remain idle and just be content with incoming friends request? What do you then?

Simple, get into your friend’s friend list and send friend request to any familiar face or name you see over there. It doesn’t matter whether you have met that person, or have ever spoken to, it’s more than enough if you have just seen that person even once in the past. Just send a request, and similar to a recommendation letter, put a scrap in the scrapbook of that person saying:- “Hey, how u doin? Remember me?”.

That’s it, you needn’t do anything else, just sit back and relax, next day you will have that person in your friend’s list.

In fact when I started off with my relationship with Orkut, I used to get more friends request than I used to send. I used to think…oh wow…I am so popular. Later when I started learning the trick of the trade, I realized that those incoming requests were from horses who were leading the race.

There are many more tricks of the trade, like:-
a. Add yourself a fan of your friend, and expect your gesture to be rewarded in the same line.
b. You write a nice testimonial to a person, who you know writes well and has good opinion about you. So, in return you can expect a good testimonial about yourself. Which would add some colors to your profile.
c. Join any active community, put some comment of yours in a discussion thread and if people find it interesting, you can see a surge in your friends list and scraps.

You guys reading this might have even better tricks in mind, do share them. ;-)

After almost a year and half in Orkut, I have a pretty decent profile in Orkut, nearly 500 friends, over 150 fans, and some good testimonials, half of which has been written just to please me so that I revert back.

Today, I have grown ‘old’ in the fast moving Orkut age. I am not so motivated by new scraps or friend requests these days. There was a time when I used to send 5-6 friends request in one week, now I hardly send a friend request to anyone.

Orkut has also at times put me in awkward situations where I myself find it difficult to recognize people who scrap in my scrapbook. These people appear stranger to me at first, but later I realize that they are there in my friends list!! I then go through their profile, scrapbook, common friends and communities to find who they are, and reply back as if I know them since ages.

It also at times becomes very artificial, you just ask people things through scraps just for the sake of it. When you log in, you can see your friends in the recently logged in list of people on the right side of the page, but you don’t feel like scrapping all of them. Instead you look out for new people, through your friend’s list or by going through the member list of some community.

In some cases it also serves as an escape route to people whom you know but are not so comfortable with, also at the same time you don’t want to make them feel as if you are avoiding them. What do you do then? Well, you just send a small formal scrap, as the doctor prescribes vitamin tablets at times, just for the sake of it, for the satisfaction of the patient who actually doesn’t require it.

Having said all this, Orkut has been special for a guy like me, who studied in almost 5 different schools across India. It has brought me in touch with some people whom I had never thought of getting in touch with in my life again.

No matter what people say, no matter how many companies or countries block it, Orkut will be there.

Orkut will be there, till we have people out there looking for online friends, old collegemates, lost schoolmates or just strangers to befriend and maybe chance maaring... ;-)

Tathasthu

2007-04-26T12:27:00.003+05:30

I am going home today for a long weekend, to be precise for 5 long days. It would be my longest stay at home ever since I joined Infy last year.

Two souls in Cochin, are eagerly waiting to spend each and every moment of the coming 5 days with their beloved Son.

If there is anyone in this world who can love us so selflessly, without expecting anything in return, it’s our parents. From the moment we set foot on this world, they have been there with us in each and every phase of our life, they have been there to look after every small need of ours.

A few weeks back I happened to see a Hindi movie, Tathasthu, starring Sanjay Dutt and Amisha Patel. While taking the CD, me and my roomates didn’t expect anything big out of it. We thought it to be a cliché Hindi movie. But the movie turned out to be one of the best movies I have ever seen. A movie, which made me call my parents right after watching it. A movie, which made me realize what I mean to my parents.

For those who haven’t seen or heard about the movie, I will just give a preview:-

" 'Tathasthu' is the story of an ordinary father who was expected to turn in to an extra-ordinary father one day. Ravi( Sanjay Dutt) is a factory worker. He is married to Saritha(Amisha Patel). They have an eight-year-old son. They were leading a happy life when came that fateful day. Their eight year old son collapsed and the world turned topsy turvy for them. Their son was diagnosed with a hole in the heart and was to under go a heart transplant. But what will a man rather a father, earning just a meager amount of five thousand rupees a month do? What will he do for the lakhs of rupees that was needed for the transplant? He asked his head in the office, the insurance agents and the banks for loans. But nobody was able to help the suffering father and the ailing son. The final decision he took was the decision an ordinary man wouldn`t have taken. But Ravi is an extra ordinary father."

Its a very simple story, about a father who is ready to do just anything in this world, to make sure that his son is able to live one more day in this world, even if it means that he(the father) will have to give away his life for that.

That movie touched my soul like no other movie has done before. It made me remember all those personal sacrifices that my parents had done for me and my sister, to see us reach a good and dignified position in life. For them we are the world. Our parents love us in a selfless way that no one else can.

But many a times, we take our parents for granted. Even I have done that at times, times when there have been conflicts between my and their point of views. But, I have been fortunate enough to have such wonderful human beings in my parents, who can understand me like no one else can, who can sacrifice anything in this world, just to see me happy.

As we grow, our view points and their view points tend to differ more, but then instead of being blunt and rude in putting forth our point to them, we should be able to comprehend the positive aspect of their view points and explain ours in a patient and reasonable way.

Today, we might be professionals who don’t need our parents support in terms of money or other materialistic comforts in life. Even our parents who have till now done so much for us, don’t expect us to give them the so called “materialistic comforts in life”. The only thing that matters to them is our happiness, our well being, nothing else.

Such a selfless form of love needs to be respected and given due value in life. No matter how much ever we succeed in life, we won’t have gained anything out of it, if we forget to appreciate the selflessness shown by our parents for our happiness.

Today, as I leave for my home, the only thing I have in my mind is to be with my parents for the next 5 days and give them all that I can, during my longest stay at home after almost 1 year.

For those who like watching Hindi movies and who don't know what to do during this long weekend, I would suggest them to see the movie "Tathasthu". I assure you, it will touch your heart.

Pack of Tiger Biscuit

2007-03-18T11:17:00.003+05:30

Often in life, we find ourselves wanting for more. But hardly do we realize or appreciate the value of whatever we already have in our life.

Yesterday while returning home I had to see one of my friends off at Madiwala(Bangalore) bus stand. There, I saw a small kid of age around 4-5, asking for alms. I know, it’s a very common sight in a country like ours where the rich, the poor and the so called "middle-class" co-exist.

If we search in Wikipedia the following topic:- "Poverty in India", we will get the following information

"Although recent positive economic developments have helped the Indian middle-class a great deal, India still suffers from substantial poverty. The National sample survey organisation (NSSO) estimated that 22.15% of the population was living below the poverty line in 2004–2005, down from 51.3% in 1977–1978, and 26% in 2000. The criterion used was monthly consumption of goods below Rs. 211.30 for rural areas and Rs. 454.11 for urban areas."

It means that 22.15% of the population in rural area has less that Rs.211.30 to spend a month for the very basic necessities. Those who can afford more than that are said to be above the so called "Poverty Line".

For people like us Rs.211.30 would be nothing. We have the bandwidth to spend that money for seeing one movie in a Multiplex, or just spend it over a buffet.

But that money can make the difference between a person being above or below the so called "Poverty Line".

It’s said that when we have something with us, we might not realize its real value unless and until it’s taken away from us by God.

Well, to come back to yesterday's incident, it was a bit dis-heartening the way, the small kid was being ignored by the so called "Software Professionals" who were there at the bus-stop.

I know giving alms to small kids, or for that matter to anyone, is not good, as doing that would be an indirect encouragement to anti-social elements who try to make money out of these innocent and helpless bunch of people. I am not sure whether the census carried out by the Indian Government takes into account these set of people, while coming out with numbers. Whatever it be, I couldn’t help seeing that small kid who was literally crying for alms, I bought him a pack of Tiger Biscuit, which cost me only Rs.4, but would make up his one time’s meal.

After coming home, when I discussed about this with one of my friends, he said that I shouldn’t have given him anything.
He said…

by giving him that pack of Tiger Biscuit, I had given that boy one more reason for his not giving up what he has been forced to do till now...

by giving him that pack of Tiger Biscuit, I had pushed him one step back in life…

by giving him that pack of Tiger Biscuit, I had indirectly encouraged the perpetrators of such heinous crime, who reap money out of these poor souls...

Whatever my friend said is indeed true, but then what was I supposed to do on seeing a small kid literally crying and asking me to give him something to pacify his hunger…?

Forgiving someone who breaks our trust

2006-02-28T08:10:00.002+05:30

Trust is one thing in this world that takes a lot of time and effort to build up, but can be done away with very easily.

In fact trust is the foundation of every relationship. Without trust, a relationship is like an "Humpty-Dumpty" sitting on a "wall"....waiting to "fall"...

Trust is "The Most Important" thing that one looks out in a relationship. You lay your trust on a person, who you think will appreciate and respect your trust, who you think will never do injustice to it...

But when that very trust is broken by that person, it hurts a lot.

It's hard to forgive a person who breaks our trust, person who was given a special place in our heart.

They might not be able to comprehend the extent to which their distrust would have affected us. They may even never realize it, because they probably didn’t know the value of trust in a relationship.

But then, whatever has happened in our life, has happened...we will never be able to undo it.

The only thing, we could do is to learn from it and move ahead in life. At a later stage we will realize that whatever happened in our past, happened for good.

A person whose trust was not respected by someone else, would be able to really appreciate the value of trust in a relationship.

Mistakes and problems in life offer us an opportunity to learn from them and continue with life...

Everything Happens For A Reason

2005-11-23T12:37:00.000+05:30

Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, if they be events, illnesses or relationships, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere.

If someone hurts you, betrays you , or breaks you heart, forgive them. For they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to who you open your heart to.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and opening your heart and eyes to things you would have never seen or felt without them.

Everything in life happens for a "reason".

There may be certain incidents in your life , that hurt you alot.....

Incidents, that seem unjustifiable to you.....

Things that will make you think twice about the existence of God.....

But then, give some time to life....let your life unfold....let life unfold that beautiful "reason".

As time passes on, and you look back at your past, you will realise that whatever happened in your life, happened for good.

So, always keep it in mind that - "Everything in Life Happens for a Reason."

Appreciating Our Past

2005-07-15T12:20:00.000+05:30

It is easy to be negative about past mistakes and unhappiness. But it is much more healing to look at ourselves and our past in the light of experience, acceptance, and growth.

Our past is a series of lessons that advance us to higher levels of living and loving. The relationships we entered, stayed in, or ended taught us necessary lessons.

Some of us have emerged from the most painful circumstances with strong insights about who we are and what we want.

Each step of the way, we learned. We went through exactly the experiences we need to, to become who we are today. Each step of the way, we progressed.